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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7662
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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Hi My partner of 8 years left 3 months ago, after I asked

Customer Question

Hi

My partner of 8 years left 3 months ago, after I asked him to go. He had been distant for a while, yet told me everyday he loved me, we never argued always laughed. we always talked about how lucky we were, we had been friends for 30 years. I had 4 children from a previous marriage that he totally adored. I had got us into debt, but he never talked about it. Since he left I have heard that he had been having an affair, although he has not actually told me.
A week after he left he asked to come and collect some stuff from the house, I was warm, friendly and so were the children, I said nothing about knowing. (even though his sister had plastered things all over facebook).
I since then have asked him to come and get his last few belongings and he was quite snotty with me, we have not had contact since.
He has stopped talking to the children, he has been really cruel in what he has been saying trying to blame me.. we have a house, mortgage together but yet he has disappeared, he doesnt see our friends.
My partner had been cheated on many moons ago and it devestated him, I cant believe that he would hurt and betray me in this way. My man has never been able to talk about his feelings, I was always the strong one. I used to ask him if he was happy, we had a good life, but since his 43rd birthday he kept saying he was getting old, and became very miserable... I am so confused I love him so much.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 1 year ago.
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Customer: replied 1 year ago.
What I had not explained was that my partner had not wanted sex with me for 14 months. I loved and looked after him. I always asked in a nice way if everything was ok. He had every opportunity to open up to me. I loved him unconditionally always had done. He knew that. I never once looked for anyone to fill my void I always believed my husband/partner would know that I was here for him to come to when he was ready. When we had the disagreement. He said that he was only happy at work. He was cold and had just emotionally shut off from me. I want him home so badly. But I don't know what to do. Help me please. I don't want to ring him, I just don't know what else to do.
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 1 year ago.
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