Thank you for your reply. I am trying to stay on a positive note and continue to be open with him. I know he is very anxious and has a lot of things stressing him out, this situation in particular because he comes right out and says it. I know he is having a hard time with it and figuring out what is going to happen with us but he doesn't vocalize it as much. It is a stressful situation on top of everything else but I have tried to express to him that other couples come out of much worse and this is just a rough patch and we can come out even stronger than before. It does feel off and slightly awkward being around each other but we also had been fighting for two weeks then he sent me on vacation for two weeks following that and now we are seeing each other so it has been awhile where we weren't together and connected. I know it takes time to repair everything don't get me wrong, it is just tough in the in between. We have been very open about spending our lives together, whether in a marriage or not, and I want him to be reminded of all of the good things in our relationship, not the bad which I think is what he is focusing on.
I have been trying to be upbeat and stay positive. I gained a new perspective on things while I was away on vacation and had time to reflect. He told me he felt bad because he did not have some kind of epiphany. When we have been around each other these last few days I have had a positive attitude and can laugh at the things he says and does that I have always found funny. He says I am being "amplified" and not that it isn't necessarily genuine but just "different". I have had friends comment to me about how he has been acting a little different towards them as well so I am starting to believe that he may be in a darker place right now and having a really tough time. I am trying to pull him out of it. I know it won't happen in a day and like I said we have only seen each other for about 2 days so far.
I am slightly afraid of planning a small getaway just the two of us as I don't want him to 1) say no or 2) become anxious before going. I don't think he would but that is me overanalyzing a situation.
We were intimate the first two days of him being home but not last night. Should I continue to be intimate with him?
That is what I thought I just don't want to always be the one initiating
it. But if he goes along with it then I take it as a good sign. I don't want to always wait for him to initiate. I am very aware of his anxiety and don't want to push things, that is my biggest fear.