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Karin Samms
Karin Samms, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 299
Experience:  with over 15 years experience offering support with relationship, mental health & addiction issues
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To Karin, Thank you Karin for helping me out yesterday.

Customer Question

To Karin,

Thank you Karin for helping me out yesterday. I am still now feeling well and don't know what to do. I just want to know for sure if he still thinking about me or if he is going to contact me back. Lot of my friends told me he won't but what we had together is larger than that. I just can't belive he won't contact me again or do anything. What do you see?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Karin Samms replied 1 year ago.
Hi there, welcome to Just Answer. I will try and help you with your question.

It's good that you are feeling well but you are going to have to play the waiting game - there isn't much else that you can do. If you contact him too soon, he may continue to not pick up your call or may ignore you based on what we discussed yesterday. Hold off, start to make yourself stronger - emotionally and start to think or write down things that you could perhaps say to him - when and if you do finally make contact with him.

I believe that as a guy, his possible coping mechanism has been to switch off, not to speak to you and not deal with his actions and instead he has reverted to old behavior and gone on the online dating website. You need to wait. Start to get your life back on track and to not sit there thinking about him constantly but instead, keep busy, keep active and let go of your frustrations and feelings of helplessness and impatience. I appreciate this cant be easy for you, but unfortunately this is a waiting game. Give yourself and him some room to decide whether he can begin to move forward after ignoring you for so long. You can then talk about all of this, hopefully in a nice, calm and open manner.

I do hope this is helping, please do come back to me for further assistance and support if you need it, I'd rather support you as much as possible and receive a positive rating and I'd be more than happy to continue supporting you until you feel satisfied.
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If I have answered your question, kindly rate my service positively before you leave the site so I may be credited for my time. If you choose to rate me anything less than positive, please do come back to me and I will clarify further or support your query further. Your question will not close and I will continue to support your question. Bonuses are always appreciated.

Kindest Regards, Karin
Customer: replied 1 year ago.

Hi Karin,


 


Thank you for your replay. I don't want to contact him and will never will. He is the one who broke up with me for no reason and he should contact. I just want to know if after all that happen and now we are entering week number 2 for not being in contact, if it will still be possible for him to contact me. I sent him an email right after he broke with me, The email was full of anger feeling, hurt, and i also told him in the email to never contact me again becasue her hurt me so bad.


 


I wonder if this email that I sent will keep him away and prevent him from calling me. There was nothing I can do at that time but to write this email. I was so angry and so hurt. Do you think there will be a chance that he won't ever contact me again..ever?

Expert:  Karin Samms replied 1 year ago.
Hi there,

Thank you for clarifying. Seeing as your email was quite an angry one, it may be the case that he won't email you unless you make the next move and contact him. It's hard to say whether he will "ever" contact you again - because this is based on how he feels and where he is at emotionally.

If you don't contact him - then it feels he is unlikely to contact you - this observation is based upon how your email was - full of quite strong emotion and anger (which you had every right to feel).

I hope this helps.

If I have answered your question, kindly rate my service positively before you leave the site so I may be credited for my time. If you choose to rate me anything less than positive, please do come back to me and I will clarify further or support your query further. Your question will not close and I will continue to support your question. Bonuses are always appreciated.

Kindest Regards, Karin
Customer: replied 1 year ago.

Hi Karin,


 


I understand that my email was an angry one. But, the nite before I sent that email I sent him a text, he never responded which made me more angry. My email - no matter how angry it was- was a reaction to his sudden behavior. What did he expect from me to do. I was part of this relationship and had at least the right to talk to him /together as a couple. But, he did not even give me a slight chance to talk and kept changing the topic and saying, I will call you after work. I can't contact him ever, he is the one who broke up with me. Contacting him, even if it was after a long time will show only weakness and will give him the chance to treat me the way he wants considering that he dumbed me and I came back.

Expert:  Karin Samms replied 1 year ago.
Hi there,

You're right. You can't give into such behavior and I'm not saying you should tolerate it, otherwise he will behave in this way again and again. I understand you're angry and believe me, I am certainly not judging you - I hope I haven't come across as such. I am simply stating that he won't contact you as he is not really dealing with this at all. He is shutting you out. Unless you made the next move - if you choose not to, then leave it be. The ball is in his court but you will need to accept this and move forward with your life.

---------
If I have answered your question, kindly rate my service positively before you leave the site so I may be credited for my time. If you choose to rate me anything less than positive, please do come back to me and I will clarify further or support your query further. Your question will not close and I will continue to support your question. Bonuses are always appreciated.

Kindest Regards, Karin
Customer: replied 1 year ago.

Thank you, Karin.

Expert:  Karin Samms replied 1 year ago.
You are very welcome.
I hope you can begin to let go and move forward with things. Take care of yourself and good luck.
-----
If I have answered your question, kindly rate my service positively before you leave the site so I may be credited for my time. If you choose to rate me anything less than positive, please do come back to me and I will clarify further or support your query further. Your question will not close and I will continue to support your question. Bonuses are always appreciated.

Kindest Regards, Karin
Karin Samms, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 299
Experience: with over 15 years experience offering support with relationship, mental health & addiction issues
Karin Samms and 2 other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Expert:  Karin Samms replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for rating my service positively, it is very much appreciated.

Take care, my best wishes to you.

Karin

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Karin Samms
Karin Samms
Counselor
299 Satisfied Customers
with over 15 years experience offering support with relationship, mental health & addiction issues