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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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Stagnant relationship; he wants us to breakup, but she wants

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Stagnant relationship; he wants us to breakup, but she wants us to work on it. Please what is the best resolution or best approach?
Dear friend,
I believe that I can help.
It takes two to make a relationship work. It is like a ping-pong match. One person cannot play alone. If this is still in the discussion stage, then all is not lost. If he has already walked out the door and is not returning calls or has left town, then this is a different situation.
I assume that you are still talking, and I also assume that you are the woman in the relationship, because he would not be likely to be posing this question.
If you are still talking then perhaps you can suggest a weekend getaway for both of you, for starters: some place in a different environment with a break from the workaday and possibly stressful world in which you are currently spending your existence.
This will give you the opportunity to face each other in a more favorable environment.
I do not know how adamant he is about this. If he still has some doubts you can talk to him about seeing a relationship therapist in order to improve your mutual communication.
You characterized the relationship as stagnant - not growing. I do not know the details of your relationship but I can recommend an excellent book which is available in book form, which means you could be reading on your computer (or Kindle device, though you don't need one) in just a few minutes:
I Love You, but I'm Not IN Love with You: Seven Steps to Saving Your Relationship by Andrew G. Marshall
http://www.amazon.com/Love-You-but-Not-Relationship/dp/0757305482/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1370983726&sr=8-1&keywords=saving+a+relationship
As long as you are talking, there is hope. The book I recommended is filled with many ideas and strategies and you will find some to fit your own unique circumstances.
I wish you great success and shall keep you in my prayers.
Warm regards,
Elliott, MAE, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Thanks for the response. It's very precise and accurate. We've agreed to speak with a counselor to see what becomes of it. Do you take appointments? I would like to ask that my information is not published.
Dear friend,
The best way to get me is to request me by7 name in mental health or relationships. Eliott, LPCC, NCC
Your name is ***** ***** anywhere in the text. I can not even know your name. If you wish me to have this conversation hidden I shall do so after the rating process is complete. I will very happy to help you in any way possible.
Warm regards,
Elliott
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I'm sorry, I meant can we meet you in person?
Dear friend,
I would love to be able to work with both of you in person, but by my contractual arrangement with JustAnswer, I am not allowed to give contact information to JustAnswer clients. If the client sends me an email address or other contact information, the computer will change the address to***@******.***.
I am a working therapist and do have a private practice, but, as much as I would love to accommodate you, I am afraid that I cannot.
Warm regards,
Elliott

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