As charming and clever as he can be, I wonder if this guy can say or write anything truthful about himself. I assume that in 3 months you have asked him quite a bit about himself--his work, his interests, his PAST, his family. Did you get answers that you believed?
Kate doesn't seem to be responding today, so I'll do it. I read your previous communication.
Does he rely on humor non-stop? Is charming, quirky and childlike all he does? He could casg a spell on you with those moves, but did he do that when he met your people? and how much has he let you into HIS life? Do you know what's important to him beside YOU?
I can read the following true statements in his clever babblings:
1. He quite possibly has manic-depressive disorder: With you he's manic; everywhere else he's depressive. I'm more sure of the depressive part than of the manic. But you can provide the evidence for that: Has he been almost fanatically UpBeat and HighEnergy almost all the time that he spends with you? Does he not want or need much sleep?
If you haven't felt overwhelmed or frightened when you've spent a lot of time with him, then his bipolar disorder may be mild. But he seems to be very frightened to reveal anything about himself, so any questions about him or his past might have evoked mostly evasive answers.
He may be just as frightened of real relationship as he is of failing and losing it again this time. So it would be valuable to get him to talk about his relationship history. If he will.
Before passing judgment on his mental capacity to hold up his end of a love relationship, I'd like to know what you have found out from talking with him for 3 months. 3 months is normal for a woman to spring "the talk" that immature men dread, with the "C" word hanging in the air above the "L" word. But believe it or not "Immature" is not just another word for "masculine." Let me make myself clear: When anyone is afraid to say the L word, it's because he or she "knows" that Love means Commitment to a future together. His flight a few days ago and now swooping around you like a swallow in search of a bell-tower says to me that he's either afraid of a relationship because he has NO experience with them, or afraid of revealing that he has no solid core to his personality and knows that you'll find him out.
"I miss you" and "your legs are awesome" are a start at expressing feelings in ways that men can cope with better than what you were fishing for. But coming clean about himself so you can know him as he really is (and not as a "mime") is a form of commitment that I would not want to do without if I were you. What do you want to know about him that you don't know yet?
Maybe he'd like to think he's a bipolar guy from that movie Silver Linings Playbook. But a movie character is an actor, and you'll need to get him to take his mask off, even if he has to run away a bit each time.