WellCustomer you've got a start on understanding your neuronal patterns, and your relationship history is one of them, as is your religious culture. It's actually quite normal to dive into a new relationship right after a long one: because we get strongly attracted to someone who seems to automatically "heal" (more accurately "soothe") our wounds from the broken relationship: generic (companionship, desirable?) and specific ("Am I intelligent? Understanding? Attractive in the right places?") [these are just examples of ways we could be wounded. But after 6months or so the soothing has done its job, and then we may discover that we've been blind to the rest of our "perfect4me new love." This is an area that required relationship history research, not brain research.
If your former ex-BF was your first great love, then how you felt about and dealt with him could be a brain model that will influence your future loves WITH or Without your awareness, so it's better to have the awareness.
You have inquired at a site populated by trained psychologists, so you're going to get the best we have to offer. So far it's "put that behind you" and from me "don't just put it behind you, but use being single again as an impetus to understand what you liked and disliked about ex-BF (before exhusband) and how you learned to feel think & act, and add your earlier love relationships with mom & dad. Besides the evidence from 100+ years of Freud & Jung & deep psych-based systems, I'd summarize research evidence from my 2000 textbook Love & Intimate Relationships regarding parents: men unconsciously look for a woman that feels similar (as good and bad) to their mothers; women look for a man like their fathers, but also UNCONSCIOUSLY expect a lot of the same close relating as they got with their mothers. So women (if they had a mostly "good mother") are more likely to be disappointed with love than men. "Unconscious" means we won't understand what's driving us behind our conscious intentions without pretty careful detective work over months, and thereafter ongoing on our own--with dreams being one of the better keyholes to look thru.
Perhaps you don't believe in "therapy" -- but studying your past loves is very specific, and many counselors trained since deep unconscious training went out of fashion in about 1950-60 don't know how to explore that, and haven't explored what's unconscious in themselves--so naturally They "don't believe in going back to the past." I don't need to persuade you to explore that, but I do believe in pointing towards that much neglected part of the truth about human nature, when it would definitely help you to "swim against the current" of unconscious patterning. I must admit tho, that it's a kind of education (& self-awareness) that most people don't want to have.
I used my own "teachable moments" between relationships to begin studying my own history over 30 yrs ago, and since then I've studied a few thousand written histories--which I can present here more briefly and crisply than I did in my textbook.
I'm in the South myself, newly moved from Florida to Atlanta, where I'm very happy with the warmth of race relations.