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Dr. Norman Brown
Dr. Norman Brown, Marriage Therapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1168
Experience:  Family Therapist & teacher 35+ yrs; PhD research in couples
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I can not convince my husband to let go of his job after hours.

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I can not convince my husband to let go of his job after hours. He's constantly worried about what needs to be done at work, what he forgot to do, what might happen, etc. If I can get him to go away for a weekend, it's total stress about how he's leaving his clients, and what if they need him. (his job is offered to be Mon thru Sat 8 to 5) and emergency all other hours.

Dr. Norman Brown :

That has to be awfully hard to bear, because it feels so helpless. My wife gets stuck on her business up to 7 days a week and up to 16 hours a day. You could get locked into a "pursuer-distance" dynamic. THe more you speak to him about wanting some quality time, the more awkward and guilty he feels, so he withdraws into his work, because at least there he knows he's SERVING somebody and he's getting the reward for his services that he amply deserves.


So, i guess you are advising me to be more supportive, and let him "vent"? I want to do what ever will make him have less stress....I just want to help him. I certainly don't want to give him more worry!

Dr. Norman Brown :

Everything that I wrote already here has been wiped out, including the response that you have written. So I'll just have to wait until the system gets the results from before up for us both to see.

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