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Dear Debra
Dear Debra, Advice Columnist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1852
Experience:  I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
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My now ex fiance and I recently split up because I found out

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My now ex fiance and I recently split up because I found out he was going out and texting his ex behind my back. I just found out on Sunday that he was sleeping with her while we were together. After denying it all day Sunday he texted me Monday and said " I'm sorry hope u have a nice life and everything works out for u". I responded " its cool. btw i have several of ur things at my place. just wanted to give u a heads up that i'll be mailing them to u and to expect a package in the mail." He never responded which was fine. However today he texted me and said " ok thanks". I don't understand why he'd text me back an entire day later. If he wasn't going to answer me he just should've left it at that. Is he trying to get me to talk to him?

Deardebra : Yes, he is trying to talk too you.Want
Deardebra : He tried denying what he did because he does not want to lose you but he new that he was caught so he just said to you to have a nice life because he is upset about what he did.
Deardebra : Some time people do not realize how much they love and care for someone until they lose them. He knows he made a huge mistake and now you have informed him that it is over.
Deardebra : But be prepared for him appologizing and trying to get you back. He might still deny what he did to get you back. He might even try to turn it around on you saying you accused him of something that is not true.
Deardebra : But you seem to know that soemthing was going on so he can not deny what has happened.
Deardebra : I feel that in order for you both to move on you both should talk things out to get closure.
Deardebra : I am sure you have questions about what he has done and why.
Customer:

The whole situation is a mess. He had told the other woman ( his ex) our engagement was fake. he had told me he wanted to work things out but ended up sleeping with her during that time period. i caught him then a week later he did it again and kept seeing her in public places. i had told him i was absolutely done and thats when he texted me his "apology" the next day

Deardebra : He sounds confused.
Deardebra : He appologized the next day. Did he tell you if he wanted to go back to his ex?
Customer:

he said he had feelings for her yes but he didnt want to be with her one day. then sunday he told me he loved her and wanted to be with her. he went back and forth a lot. however i know that she is no longer speaking to him after her and i spoke

Customer:

shes not speaking to him and he texted me today

Deardebra : She feels like he lied too her because he had her believing that there was nothing between you and him. Now she knows that he lied too her and she is no longer talking with him. One thing I do think is if he did go back with her he would have realized he didn't want to be with her and he wanted to be with you.
Deardebra : I think he was confused about how he felt and he would have relaized that things would have not worked out with his ex because he would have missed you.
Customer:

yeah. im just confused lol. i dont understand why hed text me back an entire 24 hours later and say " ok thanks".

Deardebra : I feel he didnt want to text back right away because it would have looked like he was waiting for you to text him, he wanted you to think that he was not effected by anything that has happend. He wanted you to think he was not talking too you or he could have wanted to wait for you to not be upset and gave you time to think.
Deardebra : But I feel he waited so he could keep the conversation going.
Deardebra : This way he could wait hoping you would talk with him.
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