Thanks for the answer. Well, things at work are going just fine, even other coworkers told me that we were very professional about this and not letting our personal lives influence our work, so I'm almost sure that this is not it. We've been together for a year and a half, but we really had a deep, deep connection going until the last 2 months when things started to fall apart (there was no violence, cheating or even fights). I don't know what she's trying to achieve but I kinda blew her off (in a very nice way, not trying to hurt her or come over rude) and told her that I'm really busy with all the stuff that's going on and I'm also going to a sailing trip with my friends for 2 weeks next week, so I told her that the first free weekend I have is the last weekend in May (5 weeks from today). She went through with it and confirmed the date. I'm sorry but this is all really confusing to me.
OK, thank you. Should I ask her why she wants to go on dinner or will that come across as too needy or something like that. And the date is May 25th.
OK, thanks, XXXXX XXXXX I'm just gonna let her wait and things go along in a natural way. I'm gonna let you know about how this plays out when it will happen. Thanks!
Ryan, there has been a new development yesterday evening: I got an e-mail (yes, an e-mail) from her with the subject: something ... I'm not gonna write everything here, but basically it went along the lines of ... "Hi, I've been thinking a lot about what you said to me the last time we talked [I told her I knew what I did wrong and I'm willing to work very hard to fix it and that I still love her a lot]. I've been living in an isolated "bubble" just for myself these days, but yesterday when I drove home a song came on the radio that reminded me of you and us.
I don't know why I'm telling you this, but I just had to"So, this was the e-mail. What's up with this. Should I reply? What should I tell her? Is this her way of telling me that she wants to get back together again? I know that she's a person who carries a lot of pride in herself and she will never, ever say it out straight like "I'm sorry, I was wrong I want us to try again."
I just wanted to do a follow up, as new things have happened. I went on a sailing holiday with some friends for a week and the evening before I left, she sent me a text that she's feeling weird because I'm going alone and she's not going along because we went everywhere together during our time together. She also wrote that she's writing the text because she still cares and she feels strange that she's not being included anymore in my life and in my plans. I replied to her that I appreciate her telling me this but that "this is how things are at the moment". She wished me a nice time. We exchanged a couple of fun texts during the trip and when I came back yesterday she sent me a text "How was your trip? did you have fun?" I told her that it was great and so many fun things happened that I can't possibly tell them through text and proposed that we get coffee sometime next week. She agreed. I'm also wondering if I should send her a text because she went on a trip with her parents to their family in Bosnia and I'm feeling exactly like her (we used to talk a lot about her taking me there). What do you think? Am I doing things right? I still miss her a lot and want her back, but I cleared my mind a lot during sailing and I know it will not be the end of the world if we don't get back together. Should I send her the text? Or will I come over too clingy and needy?
I've sent the text. Got back a reply that was the same as mine. "This is how things are at the moment. Maybe some day it will be different." Later on we exchanged a couple of fun texts and she found out about some stuff about the things I've been up to and she told me "wow, you really have changed your life a lot." Am I doing this ok, or am I just getting my hopes up to high?
So, I brought here her favorite chocolate on wednesday and we went for coffee yesterday ... it was a casual coffee (a little bit over an hour) we talked about the fun stuff both of us did in recent weeks, the conversation was light, easy, we didn't say a word about (our) past. I actually had a great time just talking to her and being near her. Then we went home, agreed to do something fun together next week, hugged and went our separate ways. In that moment, my heart just broke to pieces. I cried, knowing I can't have her, can't kiss her, can't hold hands, she's not my girlfriend anymore. What should I do? Write her a letter and express my feelings to her, apologize, and ask her for another chance? Or just block her out of my life completely and take care of myself (cancel all the arrangements I have with her)? I still would love to get back with her, but I don't want to fall into a circle of depression and just losing myself in the process. At the moment, I'm feeling profound sadness.
So, I got myself out of this dark hole ... realised 100 % that it's over and told her we can be friends. Is there a chance that the 'fire' will come back after a while?