It seems that until you get to the bottom of your abandonment and childhood abuse issues, you will feel that things 'may not work' in your relationships. We tend to "transfer" past psychological hurts to current doubts about relationships not working out, even if they may very well turn out o.k.
I am aware of that,,and have worked hard at overcoming issues ,,this is very debilitating to me and i am hoping for some insight to gain some control over my emotions
maybe you could asksomeone else there who can help me with this problem since it seems like this is not what your willing to assist me with
There are some very good self-help books on how to have healthy relationships -- since counseling has not helped you, you may prefer to become acquainted on how to establish, develop and maintain a long-lasting relationship. Good luck to you!