Hi, I understand why you may want to read into every word in order to be sure of what he meant that way you can protect yourself and make the right decision moving forward. I am sorry he has done this and see why it can be so frustrating since just before he was convincing you not to go. Based on what you explained it seems to me that he is just under a lot of stress right now. Rather than defending your relationship he feels separating to ease the stress will work better. This could mean that he is not sure what to do and part of him wants to try to work on his marriage, but only he knows for sure if this is true or not. He very well may want nothing to do with his ex, but this doesn't change the fact that the way he is handling this may not be best. Rather than show your relationship he has been wanting to hide it and this can be due to the fact that he does n ot want to make the divorce more complicated than it already is. He must feel t that his wife is already giving him enough trouble with the divorce that if she found out about you both she would just make it more difficult and complicated. " I hope we can get past" seems to indicate that he just wants to get past all this drama and have a normal relationship with you without all of the negative external influences. Also, " once everything is done" seems to mean to me like you said when your divorced are final. However, if you are confused there is nothing wrong with discussing things with him and clearing the air. You wouldn't want to wait around for him with confusion in your heart or mind, so it would be good to clear the air with him. It really is up to you how you would like to proceed with this, but a good indicator would be is while you both are in contact to see if things are remaining stagnant or moving forward with his situation. Also, see if his actions or words have changed a little plus you may want to discuss an approx time frame he is thinking about when everything would be final because that is only fair for you to know. I hope everything works out for the best and please let me know if I can be of further help.
Thanks for explaining. I sure do understand your frustrations and I agree with everything you have said. I think the reason for the 360 turnaround was due to her putting pressure on him and he suddenly not able into continue under the current conditions. His feelings have not changed and this is why he texted you those things. He wishes things could he different, but at the present he feels this is the right thing to do. I think he was just dealing with all of this within him and just one day woke and felt the pressure to thick on him. As for how long you would like to wait really depends on you , but as I said it would be good to continue to analyze the situation and see how things go in order for you to remain aware and make the right decision for you personally.
Hi I am so sorry what happened and hope you are doing well physically.
His actions are confusing. However, I do think
That his wife could have been there and since he probably told her there is no one involved in order to keep the peace and get what he wants out the divorce he had to respond like that
He probably made it out as you are someone that likes him and he wants nothing to do with you and had to prove that
In order for the divorce to go as he plans and her not rebel even more than she is already
I also think that the reason why he wanted to know so much why you need to talk with him so bad is because he said he needed space. Therefore he is wondering what is so important that needs to be talked about. Have is probably thinking at this point you should not be needing to talk with him given the situation
Sure no problem
Since he said he needs space right now to iron everything out this is probably the reason he is wondering so much why you need to talk with him. He probably kept asking your sister what was so important that you needed to talk about because he feels you should not be depending on him at the current time due to his situation.
I don't think its that he doesn't care, but he needs to speed things along and do what is needed rather than remaining slave to her. It is only fair to himself and you.