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Ryan LCSW
Ryan LCSW, Relationships
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Professional therapist
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Hello, So I have been arguing with my GF about a certain

Customer Question

Hello,

So I have been arguing with my GF about a certain subject. I just want a professional opinions on this.


My question is. When the opposite sex comments on me on a social network site stating that they cannot keep staring at my artwork and I reply back saying keep staring, is that so wrong? My gf thinks its disrespectful to her because im joking back. I understand she says it may open doors for them and may make them feel special. I cant control how people take things. And I know I close my doors to the opposite sex already. Im very happy and in love with my woman. I respect her and do what it takes to make her happy. I don’t even talk to people online. I usually just say thank you. But because I say “keep staring” she takes it as im disrespecting her. I don’t think so at all. Im honored for people to stare at my work and would love the whole world to stare at my work. I would jokingly say that to anyone on a social network. But why am I at fault as it seems from her point of view. I I think she has an insecurity about this. I don’t see nothing wrong with showing my appreciation back to anyone, guy or girl. But every time its a girl she confronts me. How come not a guy? She says she knows I have good intentions and knows im not interested in these girls. But she says females take things differently. I cannot control people reactions or feelings. We can control ours. And to fight and argue over petty things like this makes me feel like im such a bad person by disrespecting her.

Making my woman is most important of course. Not others. But I don’t see a wrong in showing the appreciation back to anyone guy or girl. Is that so wrong? Im a positive and a happy person that does joke around. I noticed now I don’t as much because of my gf not like me doing that. So I don’t. Its because I respect her feelings and I am trying to make her happy as well. I don’t understand why she cannot see the big picture and know my true intentions. I don’t care for any woman but her. I don’t even have female friends because she doesn’t want that either. I don’t care for that though which im ok with. But I really think she has an insecurity.

She also had mentioned possibly she should have come to me first instead of just reacting. I think her approach can be very attacking. She has the issue with me. Its not just a concern and easily talked out. She will feel so hurt and and tell me im just disrespecting her and then we get this whole big argument. Defending each others points of views. In my opinion we both have valid points of views and we should both take the time to listen. I guess its not that easy.

I just need help and some advice. Thank you very much for your time.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ryan LCSW replied 1 year ago.
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Customer: replied 1 year ago.

So I even sent her the question I asked you. She was extremely upset and said I didnt ask the question. I suggested the answer. Did i?????

Expert:  Ryan LCSW replied 1 year ago.
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Customer: replied 1 year ago.

Yes thats the question.


 


But from what I wrote to you she felt Im lying and trying to make myself feel better. Saying I made myself like an angel and her the bad girl. I think shes an amazing woman but we are talking about this issue and how i feel. We all have feelings and this is what I tell her. im not lying to anyone and I just want questions and this is how if feel. Is my question wrong? She says i want fake happiness by making her look bad? The question is towards the issue not about how awesome she is.

Expert:  Ryan LCSW replied 1 year ago.
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Expert:  Ryan LCSW replied 1 year ago.
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