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Jen Helant
Jen Helant, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1386
Experience:  I have a degree in psychology and worked with many couples. I am happily married and have been for 10 years.
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So i recently made a profile on ok cupid, and struck up a conversation

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So i recently made a profile on ok cupid, and struck up a conversation with a girl who seemed like someone worth getting to know. We emailed back and forth for a few weeks and than i asked for her number and eventually I asked her to dinner, which she agreed. The dinner went well but considering it was a first date, there were a few moments of awkwardness, however she did agree to a second date. The second time we hung out, it seemed much more relaxed and I was beginning to be concerned that this may be more of a friend situation, she made a weird facial gesture when i offered to pay and I couldnt quite read the nature of her body language. However, the date went well, and as i dropped her off, she seemed to be looking for a goodnight kiss, which i did not give because at this point i was convinced that she thought this was a friend situation. Finally, we recently watched a movie together and things went very well, and it seemed as if she would be open to a kiss, but when i went to kiss her it seemed she wanted to keep the kiss short and maybe that i had misread her body language. My question is, should i gather that she believes this is friendly or did she just not expect a kiss? Did i misread this situation?

jenhelant :


jenhelant :

I am here to help. Please give me a few moments to carefully read and answer. Thanks




my computer is acting funny you still there

jenhelant :

I do understand your concern. It is hard to say exactly without knowing her, but based on the situation I would first think about what she was looking for on the site if it was more than friendship then there is a good chance that is what she wants However, some people may need a little more time than others to get to know someone. She may like you as morethan a friend, but could have very well been shocked like you said. She also may not be wanting to move that quickly. I would not assume she is just wanting to be friends at this point. I would just continue things along and enjoy each others company not worrying about the kiss or rushing things. See how things go after a few more dates and if nothing progresses then I wojkd try having

jenhelant :

a conversation about it.

jenhelant :

Please reply if I can be of further help and I wish you both the best.


Well, thats the thing her profile sited dating, and friends..and to be frank it is a dating website and not a friend website

Jen Helant and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you

So sorry there was a problem with the chat feature, so needed to switch over the this question and reply.

Seems like she is looking for a relationship that starts with a good friendship. Most best relationships are when the two are friends. Try not to jump to conclusions. She may just want to take things slower and may have not been ready to kiss on the 2nd date. If you like her go on a few more dates and see how things go from there.

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