How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Dr. L Your Own Question

Dr. L
Dr. L, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1168
Experience:  Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
63993671
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Dr. L is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Dr. L, He appeared today in my office. He wanted to talk

This answer was rated:

Dr. L,
He appeared today in my office.
He wanted to talk because he was angry with me and wanted to clarify things, but he wanted to do it outside of work.
I couldn't accompany him because I had to pick up my son, but I started telling him that this wasn't working for me. He didn't let me speak and said that he prefered to talk outside of work.
Later he texted "I love you, that doesn't change. But I have reasons to be angry with you."
I replied "I just got home. We will talk when you have time. Enjoy your movie." (He said he was going to the movies since he had nothing else to do).
Hi, I am a Moderator for this topic. I sent your requested Professional a message to follow up with you here, when he is back online. If I can help further, please let me know. Thank you for your continued patience.
Hello,
So...he was angry. And he was punishing you. Wow!

If find it strange that he wrote I love you...

I call this the "slap kiss" .... he is angry (the slap) yet says he loves you (the kiss).
The point of the slap kiss is to keep you in your place by confusing you and making you feel that you deserve to be slapped for misbehaving or getting out of line. It's a controlling and abusive strategy.

I'm not sure why he wanted to do this outside of work....my worry is that he felt so explosive that he did not think he could appropriately contain his behavior.

I will look for you tomorrow so that we can chat about this.
Dr. L, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1168
Experience: Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
Dr. L and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you