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Ask Karin Samms Your Own Question

Karin Samms
Karin Samms, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 300
Experience:  with over 15 years experience offering support with relationship, mental health & addiction issues
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i have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 7 year

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i have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 7 year 2 weeks ago he said it was over because we do not communicate any more we dont have sex he moved out he lives with his friend now but he still calls me every second day to see if i am all right. do you think this is a temporary break up all a break up for good. this is the first time this has happen in 7 years
Hi there, welcome to Just Answer. I will try and help you with your question.

It feels as though this decision has been hard for him. It sounds as though there may be room for some communication. Have you tried to talk to him and perhaps consider ways that you could both move forward with this? The fact that he is crying and remains so upset could indicate that he didn't want to make this decision but feels there isn't any other way.

Do you feel you would be prepared to meet him half way and re-evaluate your relationship with him and perhaps ask him to give the relationship a second chance? He sounds as though he still cares deeply for you, the fact that he's calling you every second day shows this. You need to decide if you want to try and make this relationship work and if so, you will need to fight for it and be more assertive and even suggest taking things slowly but giving things a go again.

Strategies to try and make the relationship work might be to try and meet up, talk, perhaps go for coffee, talk about your day, how his day's been, what are his goals/ambitions for the future- things like that, does that make sense? You may need to take a step at a time as he clearly is upset and wants to end it (but perhaps his heart is saying something else and so you have a chance to try and salvage things by asking him to give it another go).
Regarding being intimate, if the sex has stopped then you need to think why this has happened. There may be other issues here and so you would need to think about ways to make things more romantic again- hugs and cuddles, kissing again - all those types of things can help to progress a relationship - even holding hands can bring intimacy back into a relationship.

Best of luck, please accept my answer if my response has been helpful, however please don't hesitate to come back to me if you need any further clarification. If I have answered your question, kindly rate my service so I may be credited for my time. If you choose to rate me anything less than positive, please do come back to me and I will clarify further or support your query further.

Kind regards, Karin

Karin Samms and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Hi Ricky,
Just touching base with you and wondering how you got on with my response. Did you make any final decisions or are you reflecting on things?
I hope all is well with you; you know where I am if you need further assistance or support, just put "Hi Karin.." at the start of any new questions and I will do my best to help you :)
Take care, Karin

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