Hello, It sounds like you've been going through some very difficult interpersonal struggles with your girlfriend and really your whole family as well. Your primary question is about your girlfriend and you're wondering if you should wait for her, until she is ready to see you? Is that correct?
Well, first of all, I would like to try and perhaps understand what she is going through, so I can prepare myself for when - and if - she is ready to see me.Most of all, I would like to be completely open with her, lay my cards on the table, and give her insight into what caused me to be like that (And assure her that it wasn't her fault, and that it's not who I really am), as well as be there for her and show her how much I truly care for her, and I would like to know how I can go about doing that.
I've read a lot about what pregnant women go through, and I've read A LOT about the effects of hormones in search of an answer. At nature, I'm a very analytical person, and I always strive for an answer that satisfies me - which I have been unable to in this case. I have climbed out of my pit of despair and depression having managed to sort my head, and I see things so much more clearly now, and I want to be there for her, and focus entirely on her and truly understand what she is going through (Even if she doesn't want a relationship with me. She still means the world to me either way)
In short? I want to understand, so that I can be there for her, and show her that I truly care for her, and that I'm ready to assume responsibility for everything
Is there anything I can do, short of just waiting for her to come to me? My intuition tells me that pushing for her to meet me will only stress her further, and make matters worse
My only fear is that when she is ready, it'll be too late
I'll be awaiting your expertly answer, Mr. Expert :)
Oh, and I should probably mention that she keeps coming up with (stupid) excuses for not wanting to see me or talk to me. At one point she said angrily wrote that she didn't want to see me because she" knew what I would do" if she did. She basically accused me of wanting to manipulate her. Then she told a mutual friend that she didn't want to see me yet because she would feel bad for me if she did, yet she had no problem being downright cruel to me over in writing. And that one time I saw her, the 23rd of December, I was lighthearted and relaxed, making jokes. I didn't even mention the relationship, and, when I asked her if we could talk, she said "Not now" or "Not yet" (I don't remember exactly). It's so irrational, and it doesn't make sense. It's so frustrating
And I don't even know if she's still pregnant; I can only assume that she is without much certainty. I'm not buying the whole "I was never pregnant"-deal, though. Too many contradictions for that to be true, in my mind
Probably more of a reply than you bargained for, but what can you do? It's a complex situation haha
People tell me I should just forget about her and move on, but I can't do that - not when there are so many unanswered questions and when things are the way they are
So that's not an option for me, really. I believe it's worth fighting for
Another thing I should probably mention is that it's been almost a month since she broke up