Hi and thanks for writing JA are you there>
I have read your post and am just so sorry to hear about your loss. You know the "gold standard" in mental health;/psychiatry is three months for the loss you describe (and I so much wish you and I could chat about this and not send emails). I completely understand how painful this is for you and it matters not which party initiated the break, it remains a huge loss......I tell my clients in your situation that this is a bit like losing an arm or a leg.
It is so great that you know that you need to reframe this so that you can recover. I find your insight into your situation so healthy. You know your pain is transient.and that is the first step in healing. You know this is a temporary situation and that you will heal of this
AND NO I DO NOT KNOW WHY MY RESPONSE ABOVE WAS POSTED TWICE
My clinical observation is that you feel all that you are feeling and mourn and grieve and as I sometimes say "sit in the stew" and
in time this will pass. It does take at least three months to get over this kind of loss.
I am here and will remain here for you so just let me know how I can help you further on this and it would be my pleasure to do anything I can to help you through.
Warm wishes on such a painful post.
You make a lot of sense, and it really means a lot that you're taking the time to listen and understand; your words are very kind. It makes me feel better knowing that I'm not simply being weak over this emotion; that I still have some time to wait before I can expect a more complete relief. It's the constant transitioning between the ups and downs that really make me hurt, and this is where I'm struggling the most. Though the pain is forcing me outside my comfort zone and causing me to grow, it's nothing but useless anxiety, and it makes me feel incredibly unbalanced. Can you think of anything that I can do to better stabilize myself?.. maybe a better way to frame the breakup?