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Jen Helant
Jen Helant, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1386
Experience:  I have a degree in psychology and worked with many couples. I am happily married and have been for 10 years.
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You are absolutely right and thank you. Oh my goodness -I

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You are absolutely right and thank you. Oh my goodness -I wish you were his therapist. :(

I'll continue supporting him and being there for him without prying. It's heartbreaking because a part of me wishes I could reach out to his mother but I'm afraid she'll be cold. I know his father wrote him a letter last year (after 8 years without contact) and mailed it the Marine corp and he was so distraught about it. In the letter his father was saying he was proud of him and that his health is declining. At that time, He worshiped his mother and she told him not to contact him because he was so manipulative and cannot trust him. Unfortunately she's rather similar though not as bad. If he knew his son was gay, he might flip out on him and make the situation worst! He's a police captain so he's an extremely strict man. It's so sad because he feels abandoned by his mother (who kicked him out 2 months ago) and obviously wronged by every woman in his life. This guy is beyond stubborn and once he trusts someone - he thinks they're a god. His mother, his friend here, his twin brother and all of them have betrayed him. So this gay guy seems like his light in shining armor. He actually said to me last night "even before women I've been sexually attracted to men" which made no sense whatsoever because that isn't what he said a month ago. That's why I think he's being manipulated. I suppose all I can do is be supportive, pray and just hope God can work a miracle.

You are right though, as much as I didn't want to be with him because he hurt me by constantly leaving, I still am very much in love with him. I didn't want to accept it but it what it is. I have to remove my heart out of this situation and try to help him. Thank you again. Thank you.
Hi, I am a Moderator for this topic. I sent your requested Professional a message to follow up with you here, when she is back online. If I can help further, please let me know. Thank you for your continued patience.
I am so sorry I was offline before. That's so sad everything that has happened. I hope you do not take it personal the way he reacted to you. He probably still loves you and is just afraid. It is not your fault. It is him being afraid of women in general since he was hurt. His thinking and emotions are all confused and distorted due to this. I hope he gets the professional help he needs as well as the help and support from you. Make sure you take care of yourself as well in order to not get down and to be able to be there for him.

I thank you for all of your nice comments and I am here for you whenever you need.
Jen Helant, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1386
Experience: I have a degree in psychology and worked with many couples. I am happily married and have been for 10 years.
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