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Jen Helant
Jen Helant, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1124
Experience:  I have a degree in psychology and worked with many couples. I am happily married and have been for 10 years.
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Ive been dating someone new and his family seems well off.

Resolved Question:

I've been dating someone new and his family seems well off. They all seem to be high achievers. This new guy went to a private school. How do I deal? I feel like compared to him I come from the wrong side of the tracks. I haven't had the opportunities he has.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Jen Helant replied 1 year ago.
Hi,

It is understandable that you feel like this because you are feeling inferior. However, you can not compare yourself to him. Everyone has different upbringings and opportunities and that should not determine who you are. What is important is who you are on the inside, your morals, and values.

Also, this is one of the reasons why we can never compare ourselves to others or others to others because for example some people achieve because they had an easy life then others may achieve less or even the same, but had a more difficult life. The world may naturally see the higher achiever as stronger when in actuality the stronger person is the one who overcame struggles and still achieved. For example a person that finished high school may be stronger than a person that got a PHD because of how much harder it was for the person to get the high school diploma than it was for the person to get the PHD.

The point is we can not feel inferior due to the achievements of others. That does not make them good people. Try thinking about qualities that make a "good" person and what is important in life rather than looking down on yourself.

If he likes you and you like him then you should not let this bother you. However, if you do not get along or enjoy different things. If you prefer a different type of person because you do not have a good time with him or he is not good to you then you may want to consider if you want to continue the relationship. However, if you are happy with him then don't let that get you down. Try not to compare yourself.
Jen Helant, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1124
Experience: I have a degree in psychology and worked with many couples. I am happily married and have been for 10 years.
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