Hello, I'd like to help you with your question.It sounds like there is a lot more going on here than she is telling you. Disappearing for days, not returning texts, then only seeing you for a couple of hours after you did all of that work and took time to fly to see her is definitely an odd reaction on her part. Her energy and interest is not meeting the level of work or interest you have in the relationship. There could be a number of reasons why she is acting this way. One, she could be extremely shy and did not realize that this might turn into a serious relationship. Two, she has another motivation for starting the relationship and when you became serious, she backed off or three, she has lost interest or four she is married and has a family and doesn't want you to know. No matter her reason, though, how she is reacting to you and your visit is giving you little choice but to assume that she is not interested. You cannot keep the relationship going if it is one sided. And with her not responding to you and cutting off contact, it is one sided. Plus, she has not given you any personal information so you can find her except through email and phone so you have no way to contact her, another very odd behavior on her part. At this point, you will need to begin thinking of what is in your best interest. Staying is only going to hurt you and you may end up waiting out the whole week for nothing. That is only going to upset you. If she wanted you to stay, she would have contacted you by now. So it's probably best that you go home. That way, you can at least be on familiar ground and consider your next move with the relationship. At this point though, unless she contacts you and can explain what happened, there is not much to go on. I hope this has helped you,Kate
Tuesday was the day she no-showed. I tried to get an early flight back and the helpful people at Expedia would have accomodated me for a little over an additional $3,000 so to my joy I had to stay until Friday. (I leave in 2 hours.)
Since I was stuck here, I kept trying to contact her. Skype and Yahoo email had been the way we had been communicating before, but I got no response. On Thursday night, I had the idea of using Skype to message to her cell phone. I finally got an email response:
sorry. my ex die monday night. that happend. my son is verry bad. i need to be wt him. was bad luck for us. pls forgive me.
I sent a reply asking if I could see her, even briefly, before I had to go home, but the silence has returned.
I have had instances in the past where I didn't know when to quit on people. I've thought I was being understanding during a rough spot when it was actually someone who didn't have the fortitude to tell me they had just lost interest. Is this one of those times?
Should I be understanding of what's going on with her or should I decide that even though this girl stayed in contact with me for 3 months (including several video chats where we had seen each other) and encouraged me to come to Europe to be with her for a week, she decided in one 2-hour meeting that she "just wasn't that into me?"
I'd love to know the truth, but I will settle for some thoughtful advice.
I just got home after the 20 hour trip from over there. She has still not responded to any of my emails or skype messages. I did some checking with the resources I have at home that she has been working and chatting with other people all week. Not only did she screw me over, but she's scarcely making any effort to conceal it.
I think I can safely say I've never been burned this badly by anyone before (and I've been burned a few times).
What's weird is that this didn't profit her anything. It just cost me. And this is someone I've been nothing but good to.
Obviously we're not Facebook friends anymore... LOL
It's going to take a while to get over this one and trust someone again. I'm thinking no more girls overseas.
I'm sorry to hear that she did this to you. It sounds like she may have some issues that maybe you did not know about.
Your attitude about it is good. It can be very painful when you deal with someone who treats you this way but learning from it can benefit you in the long run. Sometimes it is the best thing to take away from a situation like this.