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Dr. Tom
Dr. Tom, Tom Smith, Ph.D.
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Dr. Smith has been offering counseling for over 37 years.
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How do I stay positive when confronted with such challenges

Resolved Question:

How do I stay positive when confronted with such challenges and disappointments?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  SLREED replied 1 year ago.

I do not know the details of you situation but I will give you the answer to your general question.

First one way to stay positive when faced with challenges is to think of the good things in your life. Even though things may seem bad around you, I am sure that there are some good things to. I am sure that you have a place to live, food to eat, clothes, and people that care about you. That in itself is something to get positive about, because there are so many people in this world who do not have that. So counting the good and realizing that the good almost always outweighs the bad, that is a way to give you a positive outlook on your life.

Second, know that whatever situation that you are in, is not going to last forever. It might seem like it is going to be forever and it may seem like it is never ending, but its not. It has to come to an end, and try to look forward to the day that the challenges come to an end and not focus so much on being in the challenges.

Third, learn from your challenges. I believe that things happen for a reason. Perhaps there are lessons that you need to learn through these challenges. Perhaps there are lesson that you need to learn that need to learn before you go to the next phase of life. One of my favorite quotes is that “perseverance builds character.’’ Meaning that with hardships, they make us in the person that were are meant to be.
Fourth, branching off from the third answer. Is remember that what does not kill us makes us stronger. Take pride in the fact that you are going through challenge and that you are still standing. By that I mean it is a good thing that you have not buckled with the pressure, it means that you are a strong person. And the challenges that you are enduring is the test or your strength and it is making you stronger. So know that when other challenges later in life come your way, they will be a piece of cake because you have already been there and done that.

Challenges are not meant to kill us or break us completely, we still have to get up. And the good thing about challenges is that there is not person in this world weather rich, poor, young, or old that is without challenges, so you just have to remember that whatever you are going through are your challenges, and that there is a light at the end of the rainbow.
SLREED, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 217
Experience: MS Marriage/Family therapy. Four years as a counselor.
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Customer: replied 1 year ago.

It's been a while but I saw your answer and appreciate your response.


I still kind of feel the same way I did last I wrote you. My personal relationship situation has not changed and is possibly a little bit worse.


The last couple months have been absolutely ruinous to my physical stamina as issues with my blood pressure and physical trauma have worn me down.


 


With the exception of the past couple days, I have been unable to sleep more than four hours in the past two or three months. I feel I'm stronger in some ways and in others much weaker. While I have come to accept my limitations, not only physically but with my ability to get out and socialize, I have lost most of my desire to seek out companionship and interact, whether going out to a movie, coffeeshop or even a nearby bar for a drink. I suppose I would feel different with a friend by my side, but that's beside the point.


 


Now, I'm not sure whether what I'm feeling is the direct effect of my physical ordeal these past 13 months or just me feeling sorry for myself and using this physical ordeal as a crutch, an excuse to give up.


 


I don't know. I'm not completely discouraged by crawling my way back into the world with no guarantee of success, again, is a weight on my conscience or frame of mind.


I would welcome any input.

Expert:  Dr. Tom replied 1 year ago.
That you have not been able to sleep indicates a significant problem. From what I can glean from what you are describing is that you may be depressed. This is a medical condition. I recommend that you see a physician and have sit down and share with that professional what you are going through. Please act now. You do not have to suffer.
Dr. Tom, Tom Smith, Ph.D.
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 23
Experience: Dr. Smith has been offering counseling for over 37 years.
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