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Dr. L
Dr. L, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1168
Experience:  Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
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Hi dr L I felt like telling ków the money issue settled.he

Customer Question

Hi dr L
I felt like telling ków the money issue settled.he told me he feels bad for not being able to do much more because he is enemployed and he feels like i should pay for all meals.i felt like that will not satisfy me and i said ok i will pay half of all the trip cost plus breakfast and lunch and you could pay for dinner.what do u feel about it?i still do not feel right but a little better than paying everything all meals
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. L replied 4 years ago.

Dr. L :

Good Morning,

Dr. L :

Tell me what you don't feel right about. I think you made an extremely generous offer by saying you would pay for the car and gasoline, and then to pay for breakfast and lunch.

Dr. L :

If I read your correctly...you are now paying for half of all the trip cost....does that mean:

Dr. L :

1. Half of airline ticket

Dr. L :

2. All of car and gasoline

Dr. L :

3. All breakfast and lunch

Dr. L :

?

Dr. L :

If this is what you are paying...then that is more than generous...it is going above and beyond.

Dr. L :

If that is what you agreed to. Then look at what he is paying for:

Dr. L :

1. Half of airline ticket

Dr. L :

2. Dinner

Dr. L :

Who is carrying more of the financial burden?

Dr. L :

If you want this to be a shared trip. Then it would be:

Dr. L :

1. Each pays for their own airline ticket

Dr. L :

2. Car and gasoline would be split 50-50

Dr. L :

3. Meals would be split 50-50

Dr. L :

Right now you are carrying more of the financial burden.

Dr. L :

I encourage you to do what feels most comfortable for you...that means that you do not feel used and that you feel he is contributing if not equally, then just a bit more than you.

Dr. L :

Yes..I understand that he is unemployed. But...he wanted you to come on this trip. And...he needs to be more of the man. And...you cannot continue to pay for everything.

Dr. L :

In my way of looking at it..at minimum it should be a 50-50 split. The best scenario would be for him to pay more than you.

Dr. L :

I hope this helps with your thinking.

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