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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1427
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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I would like some information about why an adult would change

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I would like some information about why an adult would change drastically with maybe a single (apparent) experience. From being a caring loving hardworking person to basically a very selfish one. It seems he is very angry and and wants to lash out at everyone. Being very intelligent he tries to mask it with reasons. It does not make any sense. He wants to be accepted and loved like earlier but his attitude makes it difficult for anyone to be comfortable around him. Any sugesstions?
Hello. Every person is an individual and will react in different ways to different scenarios. Also, men are very different from women in many ways. If he was a hard working individual before, he probably felt like the provider and "like a man". We are all animals and sometimes it's easy to forget that the basic needs of men and women have never changed. If he felt like he was in control of his life and on top of his game, whatever happened to him that can cause all of that to come crashing down on him and he loses all sense of what he was. In this situation, it sounds as though you are doing everything that you can. As a mother, I'm sure that you have this overwhelming feeling of responsibility to make it all better. He needs to do the rest on his own. Time can certainly help, but he is obviously suffering inside and needs to get it out. I would look into helping him find some counseling if he is open to that suggestion. I would also consider talking to him about it in an honest way without blaming him or sounding like you are accusing him of anything.
Write these things down if you want to practice what you would say to him and gage his reaction. He probably has no idea how he is effecting the people around him because whenever he acts out, he is most likely met with anger or other negativity, therefore his actions don't mean anything to him other than everyone else seems against him.
You are doing the right thing by staying positive. YOu know him best, XXXXX XXXXX if time is the best thing for him to try and recover, or if you want to try and help him help himself by seeking some sort of counsel.
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