Kate, thanks for replying. The information you are giving me is very useful and scary at the same time. I did some reading on this narcissistic type of personality and there are so many traits that my boyfriend has that fit that description. They are below:
1) I give him money and work hard at his business and he takes it
2) He does give me gifts but never pays much attention during the year what it is that I really want or like. He asks me but he should know if he really cared about what I want.
3) He has a business that makes him the captain and feeds his ego but it never really made any good money and is worse now. He says its for the future payout when he would sell it but its really a loser. He takes services and money from others to keep it going and uses people like me
4) He wont show me or talk to me about anything sexual or emotional, he hates talking about that and usually will change the subject or avoid it at all costs unless he is trapped
5) He wont explain why he wont get engaged he just uses the excuse that he does not feel good about himself right now, he says he is different than most people but wont explain why. He would sooner let me walk away than be forced to make this committment
6) When he tought I was firing him ( breaking up with him) he went onto the internet to look for someone else. I assume to feed his ego because it was bruised. he now says rather than accepting responsbility that it was my fault for firing him, meanwhile I did that because of his inability to make a commitment formally
7) When I want to talk about something emotionally upsetting to me he makes me text or e mail him and then he usually wont answer with any substance. he just deals with the outer issue and wont really give any clear answers.
I am pretty sure that he fits most of the traits of the narcissistic personality disorder that you are talking about. The only thing I dont understand is that he says he loves me, he includes me in every aspect of his business be it good or bad and he does include me in almost everything he does. So what is he going to do then eventually with the ring he has? Does he think I will just wait around forever for him to give it to me or is he just waiting till he no longer needs me then hope to break up with me before I do it to him? How can i test this? Just tell him that this relationship is now what I want? Do I give him any reasons?
I am really emotionally scared at this point and really need your input. thanks.