Login|Contact Us
Question and Answer

Relationship

Ask a Relationship Question, Get an Answer ASAP!

  • Ask A Question
  • Browse Answers
  • Meet The Experts
  • How JustAnswer Works

I have had an undefined relationship for seven months. He is

 
Elliott, LPCC, NCC's Avatar
  • Answered by:Elliott, LPCC, NCC
  • Psychotherapist
  • Positive Feedback: 95.9 %
  • Accepted Answers: 626
Verified Expert
in Relationship

Recent Feedback

Positive
thank you
Positive
Great wisdom and very succinctly explained
Positive
Thank you.
Positive
Seeing the answer in print hopefully may help.
Positive
Thanks for your help!
Positive
supportive
Positive
Thank you very much. It helped a lot. I'll probably be writing again soon.
Positive
Thank you, you said what I already knew.
Positive
warm and understanding

Customer Question

I have had an undefined relationship for seven months. He is in limbo with a relationship of 18 years with an alcoholic. He had her move out three years ago. They were never married. He has become very dear to me. I would say most trusted and dearest friend. He has said similar things about me. What do I do? I feel he needs to make a decision but I do not want to lose him in my life.

 



Already Tried:
I have been enjoying his company. I am afraid to give him an ultimatum regarding the ruins of his relationship with his "ex". I am 40 years old and have not experienced a relationship so deeply rooted.

Submitted: 282 days and 7 hours ago.
Category: Relationship
Value: $15
Status: CLOSED

Accepted Answer

Picture
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 282 days and 7 hours ago.

Seeking expert testimony is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective

Dear friend,

This is a work in progress, and if you just allow it to continue, it will keep growing. The longer you stay together, without putting any conditions on him, the stronger your bond will grow.

Where she shows him darkeness you must show him light. At a certain point you will both know that somehow you will have to take the next step forward.

In the mean time, keep doing what you are doing and growing together in mutual need of one another. There is no reason to be hasty now. I believe that this will succeed for you if you just keep the timing right. Not too short, and not too long.

Right now it is developing wonderfully, from what you say. Use that virtue of patience and you will succeed.

If you wish to get back to me with more information, please hit the reply button.

Do not hit the ratings of BAD or POOR, as this puts negative feedback on my permanent record. Please allow me to have the opportunity to serve you with a better answer. I am concerned with this new rating system because I do this for a living. Thank you so much.

I wish you the best in using your patience to hold on to the love of your life. You will get there.

Warm regards,

Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC

Expert TypePsychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Pos. Feedback: 95.9 %
Accepts: 626
Answered: 7/2/2012

Experience: Licensed, National Certified; college prof;35 yr experience

Ask this Expert a Question >
 
Tweet

3 Counselors are Online Right Now

Ask Your Question Now
Relationship Questions Date Submitted
I am a 50 year old married woman with no children of my own 3/28/2013
Will Brittney Kiara Valderrama and Omer Hameedullah Paracha 3/28/2013
I moved countries to be with my boyfriend and haven't felt 3/28/2013
If a long time friend suddenly lies to you, does it mean the 3/28/2013
Hi I met a girl that I realy " like" I have strong feelings 3/28/2013
I had been with my girlfriend for about 2.5 years before we 3/27/2013
My Wife of 14 years left me 1 1/2 months ago. first she said 3/27/2013
4 months into a relationship, my girlfriend has never cooked 3/27/2013
Hello, I have friends living about an hour away who I knew 3/27/2013
I am having problems with my husband at present. Last November 3/27/2013
RSS
Next 10 >
Ask A Counselor
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
characters left:

Top Relationship Experts

See More Counselors

In The News

Nbc
Washington Post
New York Times
Cnn
Learn More

How It Works

  • Ask an Expert
  • Get a Professional Answer
  • Ask Followup Questions
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
Learn More
close
Find Expert answers related to your question.
Sign up using email
We will never post anything without your permission.
Already have an account? Sign in

Ask a Counselor

Get a Professional Answer. 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed.
128 Counselors are Online Now
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
characters left:
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.
Truste
Contact Us | Terms of Service | Privacy & Security | About Us
© 2003-2013 JustAnswer LLC