In continuation with my previous two questions, I did send my (ex) lover an email to say that I did not think it fair for him to keep blowing hot and cold and distant one day and lovely the next. I sent quite a long nice, but to the point email. I then decided I would try to move on without both men, but then yesterday he must have taken on board what I said as he was a different person again. Still no relationship, intimacy but friendship and he asked me to his for coffee, which I stayed half an hour.I have decided not to get in touch unless I need to, and will let him make the moves now. I just wonder how long it will be, but assume maybe weeks. I have started now to make one or two plans with female friends to get out and move on, so I must be starting to feel better. Its been horrendous.
giving him space, sorting my own life out without him, concentrating on myself one day at a time and getting my head in to work and my children.
That is great. It does feel better to express yourself and get some feelings out, doesn't it?! Take it step by step and do what is comfortable and stay away from what isn't. Getting out and spending some time with friends is a great way to help your mind do some other things.
Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist