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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3058
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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I just recently found out that my live in boyfriend of 3 years

Resolved Question:

I just recently found out that my live in boyfriend of 3 years installed a gps tracking device on my Yukon to track me when I travel. We are in the cattle business and travel allot separately I knew he also had issues with me working with and traveling with men but I think this is to much. Especially since I ever never lied to him about where I am at. I also found out he has been very frequently looking at animal and cruelty porn. I briefly looked at these websites and it was very disturbing. I have 3 little kids in the house and a ex husband who's always looking over my shoulder and this is a huge issue to me. He knows he screwed up bad and wants to make it up to me but I dont think he ever can. Am I crazy for being so upset over being tracked and finding all this violent porn he's into??
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 4 years ago.

CoachJenK :

Hi welcome.

CoachJenK :

I dont think you are crazy to answer simply your question.

CoachJenK :

It feels a bit over the top to me and very inappropriate the things you found on his computer.

Customer: It is the computer my 7 year old daughter plays on and like I said I told him once never again and he has never stopped just hid it better
CoachJenK :

that is VERY concerning. your gut is accurate on this one

Customer: And the GPS thing has me beyond hot. My ex husband went to prison for felony stalking and still keeps tabs on me and Wells knows all about it yet he does the same thing to me
CoachJenK :

I also believe the tracking device is way over the top.

CoachJenK :

you sound like a smart and strong woman and your gut is telling you these things dont feel right.

Customer: I have the run fast feeling inside me and he says I'm the most important thing in the world but his action show to be controlling and strange. I have 3 kids from 6 to 9 and I thought he thought of them like his own but I don't feel that anymore or he wouldn't do this
CoachJenK :

i alwasy say pay attention to the red flags and the feeling in your gut

CoachJenK :

look at your ex.

CoachJenK :

now this guy.

CoachJenK :

time to take care of you

Customer: We have built a feedlot and a house together, we have 2 huge businesses together and I feelmlikenhe thinks all of that will make me stay and he can do what he wants.
CoachJenK :

those ties definitely make the unwinding things a bit more complicated but maybe there is a way to stay in business and just keep it at that if that feels comfortable for you

Customer: I could easily do that
Customer: I don't think he can
CoachJenK :

and you also have to take care of your safety and make sure you are safe if you decide to leave this relationship

Customer: He would never hurt me I do know that. I just don,t think I could ever look at him the same again
CoachJenK :

ok well I am glad about that. I hear that and I hear that it is done for you and I think you will follow your gut and take care of you.

Customer: I agree. Thank you for the insight I just needed to get an outside opiniom
CoachJenK :

It is my pleasure and you can come back anytime and request me if you need some support while going through it. you are a great Mom. Please click accept if I have been helpful.

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