How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask TherapistJen Your Own Question

TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2341
Experience:  Providing the Utmost Care and Support
64783947
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
TherapistJen is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Hi Jen, So I took my friend out for dinner Friday night

Customer Question

Hi Jen,

So I took my friend out for dinner Friday night and afterwards we ended up going to a bar and played a few games of pool (she beat me by the way lol). This place had a nice dance floor and she asked me to dance after pool but unfortunately we came there a little bit late and they were closing up (kind of bumed me out a little bit because even though I don't really dance much I was looking forward to it with just me and her). Anyways, the whole night was pretty casual/friendly and we both had a good time. In your last response, you said i should nake plans with ner today for next week to go out on a real date. I really wanted to take her somewehere like a jazz/music cafe but I haven't been able to find one in the phone book in my city unfortnately. I know this one place that has a dance exercise class once a week for one hour for $5, this idea really appealed to me. But it's not until thurs and not only that, I want the interaction of this date to be a little different from the last one (which was slightly high energy due to the bar scene - exception of dinner). What should I do? There's not too much to do in my city during the week
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 4 years ago.

CoachJenK :

Hi Customer.

CoachJenK :

Sounds fabulous!

CoachJenK :

Tell me more about this exercise dance class...is that something she is into?

Customer :

I know she'd love this because she loves dancing. And I kinda figured, it might surprise her

Customer :

the class is called "zoomba dancing"

CoachJenK :

That sounds like a lot of fun and are you ready to let loose and Zumba?

CoachJenK :

I think it would be hysterical

CoachJenK :

I think Zumba and then dinner sounds lovely.

Customer :

so should i make plans with her tonight for thurs then?

CoachJenK :

yes. It shows you had a great time with her on Friday and want to see her again.

Customer :

awesome. Fyi, i dont consider myself to be a great dancer by any means lol, I'm just very open minded to trying new things and new experiences

CoachJenK :

Even funnier then because Zumba is different and the fact that you are willing and willing to be silly will endear her to you even more. Go with it, let loose and have fun!

CoachJenK :

and it shows her you take an interest in her interests! Nothing better than that.

Customer :

thanks for the words of encouragement. When I make plans with her, should I empasise this is a date?

Customer :

because that's what I want to do

CoachJenK :

yes absolutely. "I woulld love to take you on a real date, and I have planned something fun. I hope you will join me and help me in a zumba class and then accompany me to dinner where you can laugh at all my moves from Zumba."

Customer :

im actually wondering if i should surprise her, just tell her to bring some workout clothes lol

CoachJenK :

That could be fun too! I like your creativity.

CoachJenK :

and some clothes to change back into for dinner. You will be sweaty.

Customer :

alrite, sounds good! For future reference, what should my date and call/txt frequency be with her?

CoachJenK :

That will develop once the interest is apparent to both of you.

Customer :

I've never had a relationship before, so that's why I ask so many questions $

Customer :

I hope you don't mind :)

CoachJenK :

if you see her on thursday and during dinner all is going well, ask her out for Saturday if you feel she is receptive.

CoachJenK :

I dont mind at all...I am thrilled to be a support for you

CoachJenK :

and wehn we follow our heart it is usually a great guide.

Customer :

Thanks Jen, you're a sweetheart

CoachJenK :

thank you. I enjoy being here for you.

CoachJenK :

I cant wait to hear all about Zumba. something tells me you are going to have some silly stories for me.

Customer :

something tells me you're right =p

CoachJenK :

ok. don't call her too late tonight.

Customer :

I won't. Thanks for your help once again

CoachJenK :

my pleasure as always. Good luck!

Customer :

:)

CoachJenK :

Come back anytime!

Customer :

hi Jen,

Customer :

So I asked her out on date and basically she rejected my offer and told me she sees me as more like a brother. I told her that was no problem and I was just curious. I value our friendship more than anything in the world to let this get in the way. She was very happy I said that. Even though this was not the answer I wanted, I can not begin to tell you how relieved I am. It feels like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders! Thank you so much for all your help, and if I ever need any advice in this category somewhere down the line, you'll be the first person I go to :)

CoachJenK :

I responded in your other post. Let me know you got that.

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Previous | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Kate McCoy

    Kate McCoy

    Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    1664
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/formybunch/2010-12-06_191055_img_0975.jpg Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy

    Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    1664
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    915
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/mschase2u/2009-01-04_010319_chaseface.jpg Ms Chase's Avatar

    Ms Chase

    Life Coach

    Satisfied Customers:

    853
    Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/AL/aliciamiller/2012-4-9_21330_profilepicture.64x64.jpg Alicia_MSW's Avatar

    Alicia_MSW

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    453
    Specializing in relationship/family counseling
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/NP/nphbrown/2012-7-30_24048_ImYrManSerious1.64x64.jpg Dr. Norman Brown's Avatar

    Dr. Norman Brown

    Marriage Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    414
    Family Therapist & teacher 35+ yrs; PhD research in couples
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    366
    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/SU/suzmsw/2011-9-2_184634_Thisone.64x64.JPG Suzanne's Avatar

    Suzanne

    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    338
    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency