Hi, thank you for contacting Just Answer. My name is Ja`Ree and I am a mental health counselor. I would like to try to assist you with finding your answer.
Can you tell me how much time you are away and what it is going through your mind when you're away? Also can you tell me what usually causes the break ups in your relationship?
I see you just went off line. If you could assist me with those answers to enable me to get the bigger picture then I would be glad to try and help you find your answer and solution to your problem so that you can build the kind of relationship with someone that you are looking for. Also, can you tell me if you are male or female. I will look forward to hearing from you. Thank you, Ja`Ree
Do you think that you a woman can't be true when you are away because of having been cheated on? Do you cheat on who you are with when you are away?
How long have you been divorced?
Is another woman your back up plan? I am a little confused
So, maybe it is possible you are thinking that because you find it difficult to not cheat that the woman is the same way. Is that possible?
How long have you been divorced
How long were you married? Did you cheat while you were married and did you think she was cheating?
That would also cause you to be very leery of trusting someone. It is possible that you have not found the right person, however, I also believe that you need to find someone you can talk to on a regular basis that can help you work through your pain ( I believe you are still hurting from ex wife cheating) let go of the past and develop the skills you need to not fear being alone to enable you to not cheat and to give you the time to find the right person that you can trust and that you know she can trust you. Does that make sense?
If you choose to date someone and do not want to cheat, then you need to be willing to be in a non exclusive relationship until you know she is the one you really want to be with. However, you need to let her also be in a non exclusive relationship with you. Then it is not cheating
I would like for you to call your local mental health board where you live and ask them for the name and number of your local mental health agency to find a counselor you can talk with. I do not think you are going to be able to have a healthy relationship until you can move past the pain and let go of the past. There is too much going on for you right now for you to have the kind of relationship you are looking for. It will not be easy to work through the pain, but the relationship that you are wanting will require you to be free of the past. Does that make sense?
That is why I want you to find a counselor that can help you work on your pain and letting go so you can trust. Please find someone as soon as you can so you can be free of the past and be ready for that right woman when she comes along.
Please let me know if I can assist you further in this. If this answer has helped you then please press the Accept button at the bottom of the page so that I can be paid by Just Answer. Also, please fill out the feedback form so that I can know how to better serve our customers. Again, thank you for contacting Just Answer.
Then please find someone who can help you work through this. It is not something you will be able to do talking for a short period of time online. It will take some time working on it on a regular basis. Make the phone call as soon as possible and begin to work toward living the life you want. I hope you will follow through and make this phone call and find the right counselor that can assist you in this.
If this answer has helped you then please press the Accept button at the bottom of the page so that I can be paid by Just Answer. Also, please fill out the feedback form so that I can know how to better serve our customers. Again, thank you for contacting Just Answer.