Hello, Asker. Thank you for choosing JustAnswer.I am very sorry you are going through a difficult time in your life. The first thing I noticed is your threatening to leave the relationship. I think you have realized that in retrospect that this is an ineffective tactic to fix problems in your relationship. Just reading how you have described your situation, it is clear to me that you and your partner need to communicate openly and honestly how both of you can benefit from whatever solution you work out. An effective exercise to do this would be taking a block of uninterrupted time everyday, and expressing to your partner what she does in your relationship that you are pleased with, as well as what she does in your relationship that you feel she needs to improve upon. Then, you switch and listen to her feedback. By making steady progress to resolving your issues, you will find things turning up.I would also recommend the mediation of a marriage counselor to allow you to fully realize each other's needs.
Good luck, and please do not hesitate to e-mail me XXXXX@XXXXXX.XXX. I'd be interested to know how things work out for you. Take care.