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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2240
Experience:  Providing the Utmost Care and Support
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Is my present relationship with my boyfriend over

Customer Question

Is my present relationship with my boyfriend over
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 4 years ago.
Hello, thank for joining me. Please forgive any typos as I get very immersed in my work with you and sometimes my brain goes faster than my fingers.

-Could you explain your situation a little more? i need some more background of how long you were together, the nature of your relationship, why things ended and who initiated the break-up? Once i have a little more info i will be able to provide some thoughts. thanks so much.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Incomplete answer.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Incomplete answer.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Incomplete answer.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Incomplete answer.
I want to know if our relationship is complete over?
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 4 years ago.
I understand the question but need some more information so I can give you my thoughts.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Incomplete answer.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Hi,

I was with my boyfriend for 4 yrs and after the christmas holidays we got into a serious arguement about him being to posessive over me! He was also upset because I spent most of my time with family rather than with him. However, he had his children and i felt he should spend the time with them and not me. That's what start the arguement and we ended up breaking up. I have talked to him twice since then but all I hear is the anger in his voice and I want to know if it's really over or do we just need time apart?

Expert:  TherapistJen replied 4 years ago.
I think the best course of action is to try and spend some time together to see where both of you are and what your desires for the relationship are. If you are on the same page, then great, and it is clear you both need to work on some issues if you felt he was too posessive of you and had some jealosies around your family. You also need to ask yourself if this is the type of man you want to be with...one who is posessive and who has difficulties if you are with your family. The relationship needs to have respect and mutuality.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Yes I agree there needs to be mutual respect, but we have broke up before and he always comes back. I am wanting to know if he will try to come back again.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 4 years ago.
If that is the pattern between the two of you it sounds like he will and this will continue until one of you decides that it doesnt' work for you anymore.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Answer quality.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 4 years ago.
I believe I have given you a lot of direction and I am sorry you are not feeling satisfied with the answers. you are locked in a dynamic with him tha t both of you are happy to stay in. If that is how you want the relationship to be then that is how it will go. If you want to take a step back and see what it brings then do that. I wish you the best with it and hope it works in the way you would like it to.

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