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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1365
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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How do I break through to my girlfriend to make her realize

Customer Question

How do I break through to my girlfriend to make her realize that she can trust me not to leave her? Her father left her mother when she was about 6 years old. He never showed that he cared about her. In fact in public he wouldn't even introduce her as his daughter just as relation and that was only if someone asked. When her parents got divorced the reason her mother gave was that her father would not give emotionally and she got fed up with it. My girlfriend says that my emotions are very bright and that they are pleasant but still seems to push me away emotionally. I think it is because she is afraid. Please give me any suggestions that will help me communicate in a way to make her feel secure with me.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 2 years ago.
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Customer: replied 2 years ago.
She is worth the time and effort because I do love her. I agree with everything that you said including talking to her about it. That is a suggestion that I want to take. For a complete answer to my question I need some examples of how I can talk about this in a way that isn't mean. This is the exact area where I really need your help. Could you give me several ways I can initiate a conversation expressing what we need to work on because I am afraid of offending her. I don't want it to turn into an argument or even worse me offending her so much that it ruins what we have.
Thanks,
Kevin
Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 2 years ago.
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Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Hello Dr. Paige
Sorry I need so much help.(smile) This is a little more complicated due to the fact that my girlfriend and I are corresponding because it is a long distance relationship. I agree that it is hard to come up with specifics since you do not know her. With that being said I guess what I need help with is initiating the conversation about her father. He does not come up in conversation often if ever because of their strained relationship. This is why I need help bringing up the topic of her father in a way as to not offend her. Sorry that I did not mention that it was a long distance relationship. With both of us having hectic schedules her finishing a masters degree and work. Me working a full time job and a part time job. We write a lot of emails to each other. Any suggestions would be appreciated.I have been keeping things positive and not to serious but I need her to give a little more because my emotional love tank is getting a little low.(smile) I know she is just afraid of being hurt again if she express her love. It is the only thing keeping us from growing like I know we can.
Thanks,
Kevin
Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 2 years ago.
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