You should never be embarrassed to find comfort in any professional. It must be very lonely if that is his work schedule coupled with the drinking. The relationship cannot be healthy if he is drinking and there is no communication. Whether you leave depends on whether you are going to be happy in this relationship. When a relationship has all of these strikes against it then it is hard to find the positives but you know whether the relationship can change for the better. With his issues I doubt he will go to counseling as a couple. With that said you have to decide whether you are happier without this relationship. If you think you will be happier alone then you should consider being on your own. Either way you need to consider finding resources that will help you be less isolated. Develop those resources now. It will be difficult to make this transition when you isolate yourself. I would consider the availability of clergy and talk to them about these problems. No one is going to judge you for feeling isolated and wondering about your relationship. You can change this and you deserve to be happy.
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