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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6892
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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I would like to move 5 states away with my husband. it is a

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I would like to move 5 states away with my husband. it is a place that is wonderful for me. my family will guilt trip me in everyway possible. they will be devasted over not seeing their grandchild every week. the guilt is overwhelming but i want to do this. what to say or do? we would come back to live near them in 2.5 years. They will threaten that they may die soon, or i cant get there to help them , that they will miss their grandchild blah blah blah

This your choice and your choice alone! (Except for your husband of course) You have to do what you think is best. This means that your family and the benefit to your family (husband and children) should be your primary concern. Of course they will give you the guilt trip. That is their way of covering up the intense emotion that goes with separating from them. They present this as guilt but really they are hurt. But you have to make your decision, be firm and stick with it. First present the decision to them sort of like follows: - Me and .... are moving to ... This is our decision and we need to make it for us. This is not because I don't love you. We will be available and can come back temporarily if you need us. We will be returning in about 2 years so this isn't permanent. I need your support.


Then stick with your decision because the guilt trip probably will extend to your move. But you can't base your decisions on the happiness of others. Focus on your move.



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