It sounds like you both have not been completely honest about the break up. That happens a lot because people want to appear that they are the one okay when really they want the relationship back. This back and forth bravado leads to both people pretending that they want to seem okay so not to look like the one in pain. Before I worry about if she will come back be honest. Tell her that it was all a mistake and that you miss her terribly. Then see how she feels too. Her answer may just have been a way to look like she is okay because she thought you were okay. Of course you have to consider that she was telling the truth. That one message will probably tell you everything you need to know. There is no way to get her back but with total honesty and putting yourself out there. She hasn't cut off communication completely but you don't know if she wants a friend. Be honest and put yourself out there - it's the only way
If this has been helpful press accept
The problem is that my fear is that if tell her how i feel, it is not healthy from my side. If she decided to quit the relation, than i think it is up to her if she wants to come back. Do you think if i show her that i love her she will come back? She surly knows that i love her with all my heart as i told her several times and when i sent her flowers, i told her that in the card i gave her. What if she sees me with another woomen?do you think that will freak her out? She was always very caring to me during the relation, and i have never imagined she will do that to me.
Hi when you read other advice that tells you to observe the no contact rule there is a good reason for that. It has nothing to do at all with reverse psychology. The thing is that you the more you tell her that you love her and try to win her back the more you will push her away. Its clear that you cant see this but the reason the no contact rule works as well as it does is that you are not the first person who has broken up with someone who wants them back. You are not the first person whose inclination is to contact and convince, force if need be the person to hear you. It does not work.
Now you may not like the answer, but its the expert answer. It is the answer that works. If you were hoping for the "just tell me what which I wish to hear" site then posting here was a mistake. This is an expert site where professionals deal with these types of situations every day and we know what works.
If you are ready to hear more I am happy to help you on this but if you only wish to hear that which makes you feel better, well then............not much I can do for you.I wish you all the best either way. I know your heart is broken and that you are very desperate indeed. Feel better soon whatever you choose.
I am very pleased with your answer.So you think the best way to win her heart back in my cas is to tell her how i really feel right now..??
I really appricate your answer indeed.I want you to help me more of what i can do. In fact i am accepting your answer..
I don't think that you understood my answer. I responded that NO, you should not tell her how you feel. You should not contact her under any circumstances. I do not think what either expert has told you is what you wish to hear.
The expert answer is no contact at all until such time she contacts you and if at the time she contacts you you are not in any way to continue to overburden her with your feelings. If she contacts you again, you are to listen to her and her feelings, not put your feelings out there.
Let me know if I can help you further on this please? I am not certain I have said this such a way that it is clear and I understand how much pain you arein and would like to help you. Cathy
Oh my, I know this is so very painful for you. I can see how agonizing this is for you. I think she has moved on and I think that is so hard to hear.
If you honored the no contact rule you would not have texted her but I think that might have upset her more than the photos you posted of you and your friends abroad.
You know I cannot say for certain if she will contact you again?
I think her actions indicate that this relationship is over for her. While I know this brings you so little comfort at a time you are in such pain, the truth is that we have all been in your position in our lives at one time or another. Our natural inclination is to cling to that which we lost so we all make the same set of mistakes where we text and call and send flowers and try so hard to convince our loves to come back to us. In their eyes though we are simply seen as desperate and not loving.
There is good news and that is that we all heal from broken relationships with enough time and care. You can and will heal this and meet another young lady and fall in love all over again.
Understand that part of what you are feeling is not just the loss of this relationship but also that you are in a type of withdrawal where you also simply miss the way it felt to be in love. Being in love is intoxicating for all of us and when that is taken away we all go through a period of withdrawal that is quite painful indeed. This is helpful to know because understanding this is to know that you will laugh again and feel joy and even love again without her in your life. Your joy and happiness is not dependent on your being with this one woman only, so you can look forward to much happiness and joy.
In time you will see this.
I do know all about the pain you feel. I have counseled so many people in your situation and of course, just like everyone else, I have experienced a few break ups in my life as well.
Take good care of yourself. Find activities that distract you bring you comfort, lean on good friends and begin the healing process.
Warm regards on such a painful post.