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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6892
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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Me and my boyfriend dated for 7 years. We are bot still in

Customer Question

Me and my boyfriend dated for 7 years. We are bot still in love but 23 days ago I broke up with him. He is 19 and I am 21 years old and go to college in a different state, all of this put lots of pressure on the relationship. Before we broke up we kept fighting about where he would go to college, jobs, and marriage. I wanted him to propose and he wanted to do but he doesn’t make a lot of money and he has to pay his parents $350 a month to live at his house. I broke up because of the issues stated above. The day after the break up I called because I totally regretted it and he said that he wanted to be a lone for a while… It has been 23 days and he said he will have an answer in five more days. He says e still loves and wants to be with me but he also likes being alone and not having to deal with the stress of a relationship. The stress in are relationship was caused by my unrealistic expectations of him proposing, basing were e goes to college around me and me bitching about I’m getting another job… I feel know if we get back together things will be different because I know understand that what I wanted was unrealistic. I am still madly in love with him and would like to know how to proceed if we get back together or if we dont get back together?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.

You have to accept the answer you get and go from there. Before you do anything you have to accept the decision that he has made. This dictates everything that follows. You may be love but you have to accept his decision. It sounds like he can go either way. You have to find out how much he likes being alone before you let yourself go to the solutions to this problem. You need to talk to him and see if maybe this break is temporary. When you have that piece of information you can then let your mind think of possible solutions that fit both of you. I hope that he is receptive but accept whatever his decision is. He has to want to try again. I wouldn't give up if immediately if he isn't receptive. But you can't allow yourself compromises for being together either. If he says it is over, then you have to pursue that plan to forget him.


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