How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask psychlady Your Own Question

psychlady
psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6892
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
52358615
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
psychlady is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

ive been married 20 years. 5 years ago my son was murdered,

Resolved Question:

i've been married 20 years. 5 years ago my son was murdered, same 5 years, I also had an affair. My husband and I committed to 2nd chance. And it's was going great, new love and respect occuring. i'm in love with husband.
i've betrayed him again by having an internet realationship with same man. i can't even answer why. my marriage is very likely over. i don't understand my mind set anymore.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.

You have to find out what you are looking for when you seek out the affair. It is having some benefit to you and that is the key to why you look elsewhere. Is it attention. Is it something that is lacking in your marriage. You have to figure that out. It may even be some sort of validation. There is something lacking that you doing this and there is a payoff to it. What is that. Is it a way to divert away from your grief. You are willing to risk everything so it has to be something major. That is where the key lies. Marriage counseling can't help you decide what you are looking for. I would pursue an individual counselor. Find out why you are doing this in order to stop it. It may just be a dysfunctional way to dealing with a void. Your marriage certainly is in danger. Because now you have to tell him about this. Their may be some sympathy to forgive you if you seek help. Grief can take many forms. So does a marriage when there is something missing. Find a way to get past this.

 

Sorry for the delay. If this was helpful press accept

psychlady and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you

Related Relationship Questions