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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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I dont feel like having sex anymore. I love my partner but

Resolved Question:

I dont feel like having sex anymore. I love my partner but i cant beah him touching me. This is obvioulsy a sing of underlying issue but nothing obvious to me. Could you please advise. Thanks
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 5 years ago.
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Dear friend,

I assume that you are getting on with your partner. I assume that he hasn't cheated on you or that you even suspect as much.

If you are very angry at him for something he said, or did, even something in the past that has just come closer to the surface of your consciousness, then this could trigger such a response.

Of course with such a strong revulsion to him, one that you cannot overcome, and with no external reasons for this sudden onset of disgust for his touch,

This is a diagnosable disorder, called Sexual Aversion Disorder and can depend on a number of factors including your own sex drive, your self-esteem, sexual satisfaction in the past, a good relationship with your partner in other areas, having previous low sexual activity, having low exual desire in general, or in suddenly finding your partner unattactive for other, unknown reasons.

I assume that you are not having any vaginal pain, and that this is purely psychological. It could be that you are suffering from sudden anxiety, which could possibly bring this on, but this will have to be explored in depth by a professional.

I urge you to locate a marriage and family counselor who is ALSO a certified sex therapist. I assume that your partner is aware of this issue as well, in which case you both should go together to explore your situation and find the road back into positive relationships.

Warm regards,

Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC

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