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Dear Debra
Dear Debra, Advice Columnist
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
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theres a person that i have feelings for aand cant stop loving

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theres a person that i have feelings for aand cant stop loving him,and hes married
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dear Debra replied 5 years ago.
Often times people develop feelings for others. It is very natural to have a connection with someone. You said you can not stop loving him. Your feelings for him are strong, but he is married. He is not an available man because he is committed to someone else, but your feelings for him you can not ignore. I want you to look at your feelings in a new way. If he wasn't married and ask yourself this question, do you still feel you would have these strong feelings? Some times because someone is married and you know they are safe. That you can have feelings for them but nothing is going to happen. This can ac cur when you are nervous to start a relationship. You need to first look at if you would want a relationship with this person if they were not married. Think about your feels. Ask yourself are your feelings stronger because he is a challenge because he is not available? Is this person you feel is perfect for you and you love all their qualities? You first have to sort out your feelings and see why you love this person so much, even if you write it down on a price of paper describing how you feel. If you have anymore questions I am here to answer.
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Customer: replied 5 years ago.
but he used to look at me every time hed pass by,an all of a sudden when i try to come closer he backs away from,its been about nine months.and now drives around with her to show me her, to show me hes good with her.
Expert:  Dear Debra replied 5 years ago.
You feel like now things have changed between you and him. There are things he use to do and now he has changed. There might have been a time where he was having a problem in his marriage and now they have worked things out, so he is now showing you he's ok with her. It could also be she might be jealous and told him to back off. Its hard to tell what th reason is, so I feel you should come right out and ask him.
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
yeah but every time he sees me its like hes mad at me.
Expert:  Dear Debra replied 5 years ago.
I would confront him on that issue. I would simply say are you mad at me? Is there something I did that I don't know about? This would resolve what is truly going on.

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