How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask psychlady Your Own Question

psychlady
psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6886
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
52358615
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
psychlady is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Hi. I am a 35 year old female. I have a friend who is 11 years

Customer Question

Hi. I am a 35 year old female. I have a friend who is 11 years older than me and means the world to me. We work together and for the past 4 years have done everything together. I am married and she is not. It seems like everytime she has someone new in her life, a new friend, a new boyfriend anyone - I am pushed to the backside. I have opened my eyes lately to the relationship we have had. When she needs me, she calls. I have helped her in so many ways around her house, babysitting, an occasional loan etc. it seems if she doesnt need anything from me, she totally ignores me. I will text her and she may respond with one word or she may not answer at all. A few weeks ago she wanted me to come down and help her open her pool so she could have a cookout for her niece, so i did. We ended up doing the pool, mowing her hillside, cleaning her garage and a few other things. She invited me to the cookout but at the last minute changed it to the following weekend -but I was not invited and didnt even know she was doing it. I had texted her the morning of and asked what her plans were for the day and she ignored me. 3 days later, she asked me down - later in the evening she mentioned she needed gas money for work, so I am assuming thats why I was invited. A week later she was having a friend from out of town come in and asked if I wanted to go out with them one evening. I said I am looking foward to it because it was around my birthday and thought it would be nice to get out. I was getting ready and got a text that said, I think we have decided not to do anything, just wanted you to know. Even being the adult that I am, I was absolutely devastated. I cried like a little school girl. She didnt apologize or say we'll do something later - she just ignored my texts after that. We have worked at the same place for several years and she just transferred back to a clinic we cannot stand ( or so she says) There is another 30 something girl that works there who can suck anyone into her world. I was so scared that she is doing this to my friend and she may never look at me the same. I know it doesnt seem like much of a friendship at this point but I am so depressed over this I dont know what to do. Everytime I ask her for something, go to dinner, come down to swim, hilight my hair, she always tells me no. Can you please help me know what I should do? Sorry for rambling.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 3 years ago.
THIS ANSWER IS LOCKED!
You can view this answer by clicking here to Register or Login and paying $3.
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I don't know how to let this go. We work together and I have to see her become friends with others we work with knowing she doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. I keep asking myself, what is wrong with me that Im not good enough. My heart has literally ached for the last few days because I am so devastated. We were so close and for her to not even give me time after all i have done is beyond anything I can comprehend. I would never treat someone like that. I am the one who gave so much yet I am the one hurting over it as if I am the one losing out. I wonder if she will ever miss me or regret pushing me to the rear for someone who is not truly her friend.
Expert:  psychlady replied 3 years ago.
THIS ANSWER IS LOCKED!
You can view this answer by clicking here to Register or Login and paying $3.
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
What do you mean she will end up missing a good guy? If you mean me - I am a female and we ate close friends.
Expert:  psychlady replied 3 years ago.
THIS ANSWER IS LOCKED!
You can view this answer by clicking here to Register or Login and paying $3.
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I don't really understand what that has to do with me.
Expert:  psychlady replied 3 years ago.
THIS ANSWER IS LOCKED!
You can view this answer by clicking here to Register or Login and paying $3.
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Dear Debra

    Advice Columnist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1719
    I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DE/deedeeham/2011-1-24_51523_408.64x64.JPG Dear Debra's Avatar

    Dear Debra

    Advice Columnist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1719
    I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/formybunch/2010-12-06_191055_img_0975.jpg Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy

    Counselor

    Satisfied Customers:

    1235
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/RE/resolutions66/2011-1-17_05728_IMG8202smilingeditedforJustAnswer.64x64.jpg Elliott, LPCC, NCC's Avatar

    Elliott, LPCC, NCC

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1215
    35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/CO/CoachJenK/2012-3-9_31019_Jen.64x64.jpg Coach Jen K.'s Avatar

    Coach Jen K.

    LMSW, CPC

    Satisfied Customers:

    726
    Providing the utmost care and support.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/IN/intrapsyc.com/2012-2-20_161928_RGMTPicturex5002012.64x64.png Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    549
    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/HU/hungryjack20/IMG_1281_edit_2.64x64.jpg Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    349
    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/SU/suzmsw/2011-9-2_184634_Thisone.64x64.JPG Suzanne's Avatar

    Suzanne

    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    338
    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency
 
 
 

Related Relationship Questions