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Dear Debra
Dear Debra, Advice Columnist
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
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I have been communicating with this girl for over 3 months

Customer Question

I have been communicating with this girl for over 3 months via text. We both leave in different cities.. We've been talking everyday for the last 3 month non stop. I had to see friends in the city where she leaves. Informed her of my visit 2 weeks before hand so she was aware of me coming. We made plans to meet up for dinner which was pre arranged. On one of the night i was there, she was out clubbing with friends and asked me to join her in the club. She was really why when i say her at least that how she came across. I left the club before her as i felt i was making her unconfortable. Told her to contact me when she wakes up next day so we can go for lunch or dinner. I messaged her as it was getting late. She replied saying if we couldnt do the next day knowing full well that i have made plans for the day. well i called her and her sister picked up saying she was in the shower and she'd ask her to call me back. She didnt. So i pressed on to find out why she was acting really weird within a space of 24hrs and shes say 'to be honest i dont really know whats going on' 'my head is mashed' so i said to her you can talk to me about it instead of leaving things to hang. at one point i said to her am guessing we are not on speaking terms and she said of course we are..The whole conversation was just awkward so i tried to make it more interesting. So i said you know when i type your full name out i was serious. So she said thats what i dont like the seriousness. so really dont know what to do. Shes not been clear about her intentions or what she wants and its bugging me.. Well I ignored her for a week and suddenly she sends me a message asking how comes we don't talk anymore. So I said I don't you tell me. I mean we text ones in a while but not as we use to in the past. Am totally confused considering she's the one that started acting funny and after ignoring her shes bk talking to me. I like her however I don't want to sell myself short. I don't know if it's a good idea to still ask her why she was acting distance from me. We speak ones in a while now not like before. I feel there's a form of distance. I spoke to her on the phone and she said i was over thinking things. I asked her out on a date she said yes but since then she wouldnt initiate a conversation only when I speak to her. I really want her to be open with me but can't seem to get through to her. I really really like this girl. Can I redeem this one?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dear Debra replied 3 years ago.
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Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Thanks for your reply. What do your mean by start seal and move on. And also we haven't set a date for the second date. Should I ask about it later or just leave it. And how long should I keep been the one who initiate a conversation with her considering she usually initiates a conversation. I really don't want to see desperate but I mean she knows I like her.
Expert:  Dear Debra replied 3 years ago.
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