You have to evaluate whether you consider his mailing and phone sex count as cheating. If you see this as innocent and not harmful to the relationship then that's fine. But if you see this as a way to have sexual pleasure with other people then you may ask that this be eliminated. You should never feel that your husband is substituting you or eliminating you to have sex in other ways. You should both be comfortable with your sexual choices and your mates. You are not doing anything! He has to confine his sexual habits to include what you are comfortable with. Men often do these things for the sexual excitement, but if he is married and you feel that you have done something wrong then it is not healthy. If something is not healthy it will harm your relationship. Have a discussion with your husband or even with a marriage counselor. Both of you have to identify sexual habits that are conducive to a healthy relationship. Talk to your husband. Don't buy the excuses. That's all they are. These are a way to continue doing what he is doing.
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thanks can this also be that he is 55 and having trouble cumming inside of me and things are slow ing down also but not with me and looking at younger women helps this out but i know i am still sexually active and my drive is good and i am 50 so confused