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psychlady
psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6892
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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I am seeking advice on how to get my ex girlfirend of two years

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I am seeking advice on how to get my ex girlfirend of two years back. We had a wonderful relationship with many great times. She told me i was the man of her dreams and she wanted to spend forever with me. We did have small disagreements (never angry or verbal argument only acts i did or said things she did not like complain or be negative about something) but we always made up. She ended it two weeks ago very unexpected saying we are not good together after two years of saying how much she loved me and i was the man for her.

She then called a few days after she broke up wiht me to say hi very short and simple phone call. She acted nervous and giddy like when we first dated and talked on the phone. I waited a week and left her a voicemail and follow up email last Friday with no response from her. Then yesterday she emailed me apologizing for not getting back to me. Her email reminded me of the ones she sent again when we were first dating 2 yrs ago and she ended it the same with her name and a smiley face like the first emails. She hoped all was well and said her new job was stressful and time consuming (she started this job one week before the break up. She said she would call this weekend.

I have done lots of research, some soul searching and followed my heart with this matter. I have given her space and in an email a week ago told her i agreed the break up was for the best and that i did not want our friendship to end. I also said i know what negative traits i had and i am working on being a better man.

I will do anything it takes to get her back. I assume the ball is in her coiurt and I should wait until she calls this weekend. I am trying to see her and hope hanging out i can show her the great qualities and try to reconnect. I do not know what else to do or how to fix this. This is one relationship i cannot simply walk away from or forget as i know for certain she is the one. we are both 30 years old.

She also lately has had some stress with the new job, her mother offering her to live back on the west coast and her not being happy with living in the nyc/ hoboken area.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.

Some would say the ball is in her court and that is true for the most part.. However I would say you should actively pursue what you want. Playing coy sometimes doesn't work many times. Instead focus on making positive changes and letting her know that you are making them. Show her that you are willing to make these changes. Call her and schedule a discussion to work on the issues at hand. Have a plan on change and on whether she is willing to reunite. She may be since she is in contact. Find out from her what her expectations are and address them. You may find that you can address these immediately

 

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