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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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I broke up with my ex of 9 months in February. I initiated

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I broke up with my ex of 9 months in February. I initiated the split by stupidly sending a text ...by accident. Given that I was writing the message clearly shows that I wasn't happy at some parts of the relationship so I guess it was meant to be. I did try to pull it back but he decided that he couldn't make me fundamentally happy with the baggage he'd bring and was one of my areas of concern anyway. Anyway, i have missed him and so sent him a message last Thursday (4 days ago) about work and that something that I wished I could discuss with him and he replied quite gentlemanly. I then replied asking if he'd like to meet up for coffee/glass of wine - he replied "yes ok. Have been wondering how you were. Tae care. x" I replied saying "Great. Let me know when is good for you. x" Should I leave him to get in touch or should I push it? It's been a 4 day weekend in the UK thanks to the Royal Wedding. We're both in our early 40's. Many thanks. M.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 5 years ago.

Hi,

 

 

He still is the one to decide about how to respond. But, with things being busy for both of you, you can just send another message or phone and say that you're just following up to see what would be a good day and time to meet because you do not like to leave things like this over the phone/email and would rather talk in person. At that point, if he follows up with making the arrangements or does not, will let you know how he wants to deal with the situation- either head on or by avoidance.

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Thanks and just as I thought you'd say. I guess I'm just very impatient and am probably too analytical of his message. I think the Take care line kind of gave me a pessimistic take on his message...or it could just be a throwaway remark? Time will tell...m.
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 5 years ago.

Try not to over interpret it unless he absolutely follows up with saying something else to confirm your fears. Men are not always very expressive (his response is typical) and may even indicate his hurt (and he's replying like that as a way to avoid further painful exchange of info vial the telephone messaging)

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Ah yes, very good point-it was messaging that got us to this predicament! I think maybe I've been a little selfish and not asking after him. Men, as you know too well, can be very sensitive and he is a sensitive soul so I'll see if he come back and then I'll nicely ask him when he'd like to meet.
Thank you. m.
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 5 years ago.
When you talk on the phone, talk about something neutral so he does not feel on the defense. When you see him in person, about the relationship.
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