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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6892
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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My 9 year old daughter accidentally noticed my boyfriends pr

Customer Question

My 9 year old daughter accidentally noticed my boyfriends 'privates' - he was in sweats and he and my daughter and his daughter were all wrestling around and she laughs and says 'I felt your weinie'. ok very uncomfortable for everyone esp him. I had a 'talk' with her and a week later she pokes him there and laughs. I spoke with a counselor at school and we both know this is not a sexual thing but now he has decided the best thing is for him not to be around her. And of course me. We have been together for over a year and our daughters are best friends. He is afraid she will do it again in front of his daughter and being a good dad, giving up 'us' for his daughters good. Im not sure which is worse that he is bailing on us and hence probably doesnt really love me/us or that he is doing the right thing.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.

I wouldn't say he doesn't love you he is just protective of his child. It probably isn't sexual but more curiosity. She isn't at the age to appreciate how inappropriate it is. I would schedule a few sessions with a counselor (private) to use role playing or dolls to show good touches and bad touches. Although you are separated now, this is a fairly easy problem to resolve. Then he can return when ground rules are established. Follow the suggestions to use a behavior modification system to maintain this work. This can work. She just needs boundaries. then work on boyfriend to assure him that this is all you have done.



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