Understanding him is what we need to look at first. You said you traveled to your brothers and he wanted to go home. I would like to ask you a few questions because it will help me understand him a little better. Did something happened at your brothers that he wanted to go home? Is he the type of person that gets jealous if you are around certain people? Do you think that he is a type because he was spoiled growing up that the attention has to always be on him, so he takes tantrums in order to get your attention? It is a negative way to get attention, but he is still getting the attention he wants. You have been together for 6 years and lived together for most of those years. He is very comfortable in the relationship the way it is. You are looking for more of a commitment. You have been together a long time and it seems like the next step is marriage. He grew up with his parents not being together, so he could have issues about getting married. Has he every expressed these issues too you?
Nothing happened in particular that would have set him off except that the bar we were at was in an area of the city that is not his favorite place...spoiled, yes. The previous episodes were also in circumstances where he had to share attention with someone else, so..potentially, yes, it is attention seeking behavior? Bizarre though...to be set off by something so minor? The marriage thing...his response has always been to not screw up a good thing. That he doesn't want things to change...but it seems as of late, he is pinpointing things that simply aren't issues or major deals in order to say, "see that's why I don't want to marry you." Or, "why would I want to marry a crazy person?" I, for the record, am not crazy. Co-dependant...maybe..but not crazy. I feel like I have really bent over backwards for someone I love deeply for them to turn around and say I am "selfish" and things are "all about me." I am currently in grad school and am very busy, so I don't know if this upheaval is a way to get my attention or what...but I am not sure what to do..he is very walled off about things, and acts like he just wants to pretend it never happened. Of course, now, he's involved my family b/c he made this huge scene in front of my brother. What do I do now? Soooo confused.