How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask psychlady Your Own Question

psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6886
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
psychlady is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

My husband and I have been married for 6 years. He has 2 daughters

Customer Question

My husband and I have been married for 6 years. He has 2 daughters from his first marriage whom I love very much. Before we got married we agreed that we would have 1 baby as long as it was a boy. He got his boy so we thought we were done. I really want another baby. He won't budge...he does not want another and thinks it's unfair of me to want one after I said I wouldn't. How was I suppsoed to know what I would feel after going through pregnancy, labor and watching our creation grow every day? Is this a valid reason to divorce?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 3 years ago.

Anything that can make you unhappy. Divorce is a personal decision, but make sure the reason is significant enough that it can't be resolved in counseling. Present this issue in counseling and see if a compromise can be decided upon. I know there is no 1/2 baby but maybe waiting a year or some other measure where you both would be happy. if this is so significant that you will not be happy with one child then you can examine your options. But only if remaining married with 1 child is intolerable.


It seems more fitting to try to work this issue out in counseling. There seems to be other issues. Trust is a huge problem and this also needs to be resolved since splitting up would effect the entire family. You shouldn't consider getting pregnant when things are not stable. You can explore the issue around your father's death as well. Resentment can build up over time and cause distress between partners. Resolve why you feel disappointed

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I have forgiven him for not being there when my dad passed so that is, thankfully, being us. I do not want to have a baby now....I would never bring a baby into anything but a happy home. The problem is he is so adamant about not having another baby ever. Waiting a year won't change anything. This is why I need to know if I should someone just get over the fact that I'll never experience creating life again and hope that I fall back in love so much that it won't even matter or just end it now. I'm 32 and do not want to be pregnant at 40. I hope this makes sense.

Expert:  psychlady replied 3 years ago.
I completely understand. I didn't think of the time issue. You take a risk either way. If you leave when will you fall in love. If you stay he might not change his mind. I am a romantic and just think your chances are better just working on his changing his mind. He cares about you. So if you are consistent in this being what you want you have time to work out a compromise. however if you really think this is the only way you will be happy, then look for someone nice and available. Maybe you can verbalize the fact in counseling that you need another child to feel fulfilled, and see what happens. You can then base your decision on that information.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I'm fairly confident I would find love again. Maybe I've just been lucky but I've had long, loving relationships since I was 16. I will just bring it up at our next session and see what happens I guess. Thanks anyway.
Expert:  psychlady replied 3 years ago.
You can view this answer by clicking here to Register or Login and paying $3.
If you've already paid for this answer, simply Login.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Last | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX

Meet The Experts:

  • Dear Debra

    Advice Columnist

    Satisfied Customers:

    I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
< Last | Next >
  • Dear Debra's Avatar

    Dear Debra

    Advice Columnist

    Satisfied Customers:

    I have been an Advice columnist for 14 years. My column is published weekly in local newpapers.
  • Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy


    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • Elliott, LPCC, NCC's Avatar

    Elliott, LPCC, NCC


    Satisfied Customers:

    35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
  • Coach Jen K.'s Avatar

    Coach Jen K.


    Satisfied Customers:

    Providing the utmost care and support.
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist


    Satisfied Customers:

    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L


    Satisfied Customers:

    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • Suzanne's Avatar


    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency

Related Relationship Questions