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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6892
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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I was dating a lady for 3 yrs & in sept she ended the relationship.

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I was dating a lady for 3 yrs & in sept she ended the relationship. she said she loved me but felt she had to move on. she has trust issues & told me it was apparent to her i am not a one woman man. she continues to email me once or twice weekly. i've asked her if she would be interested in putting our relationship & she says, no. she always tells me she loves me. most recently i have stopped responding to her emails (approx i week). my question is, should i ignore her for a period of time? it doesn't seem to bring us closer by continuing to respond to her emails. she never calls, just emails. pls. advise as to how i should proceed.
sincerely & thanks
I agree that this is very confusing. Although she did ask to take it to another level, everything after that has big red flags that says I do not want to be together. So don't look back because that will make it more confusing. Start from recent signals and examine them for a minute. She returned the christmas card, she told you was moving on, and she doesn't really respond other than email. This is all saying I'm done but it's also saying that I am going to find some support in you but don't want the relationship. If she's not using you now it's not far off. There is no benefit in maintaining this friendship for you so you should not give her the benefit of your communication. What the communication does do is leave the door partly open (and mixed messages). "Friendships" with old ex's hardly ever worked. Move on and find someone committed to you. This is clear and concise - no pointless communication. It keeps the heart open where there is no love or affection.
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