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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6892
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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Hello... My girlfriend had me move out yesterday. She told

Customer Question

Hello... My girlfriend had me move out yesterday. She told me about this late Sunday night. Talk about a bomb being dropped on me. Well had to come and stay with my parents! Here is the story Her 21 year old son had a fight with his father before the New Years weekend. His father wanted to keep him in for punishment. Well no go he decided to move home with mom. So he would have his freedom. She can be a bit of a push over sometimes. Well she feels she now needs to step in and take total control over his young life to get him back on track. All just fine with me. I am a patience person. But I don't understand why i should be away from her and her son. It's not like we don't get along. He dose need to grow up some but I still am able to remember when I was 21. She feels that I might be getting in the way of her trying to get his life back on track which is not much different than any other 21 year old young man. She want's him back in school and to have less free time. Should I just just be patient and let thing fall into place? I am worried that to much time away might hurt are relationship. Or am I way of base THANK YOU KEV.................................
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.
The only way to know if you are wrong is of course ask, but I can tell you that women faced with problems with a child often feel that their focus needs to be on that child. It is often difficult for people to focus initially on multiple relationships. I would say to be patient to a point. Give her time to make all these changes and keep in touch with her knowing you wish to be together. Allow her to fix this and see what happens. If there seems to be a reasonable time and nothing has changed then move on. You may find that having patience is just what she needed. You will know when you are ready to move on so try for now to be supportive
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Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Why should a couple be apart because of a crisis like this. Shouldnt we work this out together including her son. I think that a 21 year old should be happy that her mom has someone in her life, to take good care of her. We have been together for abut two years right now.Honestly If work would be a little beter for me she would have a ring around her pretty finger.. and I dont mean to sound like a sapp....................... Thank you....
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.
Yes couples should always work out things together but that is not always the reality. You should always try to do that first, especially if you have been together for a long time. It's a shame that you could not have been included in this crisis because you can be extra support during this. Blended families work all the time even during stressful situations. Try to talk to her but you may have to wait some more due to the fact that she in the crisis now. Be receptive when she has resolved some of this stress and see if you can make an arrangement as a blended family where everyone is happy. You may just find that some of the initial urgency has to be resolved first.

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