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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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I just was in what I thought was a good relationship with a

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I just was in what I thought was a good relationship with a man. He proposed to me and I was wearing his ring. He said we were soul mates and I felt the same. Very close to him. One problem was he just got a divorce. He then started behaving differently but still telling me he loves me. Still wanting to have sex with me every day. I recently found out he was chatting with two other girls. Intimate conversations and I believe he was having sex with them. At that point he was cought, he completely turned on me and now he is very mean to me except if he wants to have sex. Today, I let him know I wasn't interested in that type of a relationship with him anymore. I feel like I did the wrong thing. Why did he tell me he was committed? Even after he was cought, why did he continue to lie to me? I feel that is an insult to my intellegence.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 3 years ago.

Hi,

 

Deciding to end this sort of a relationship is a sound choice. You cannot rely on only on his words that he loves you. You've looked at the actions and they are contradictory.

 

Why he is behaving like this can be caused by different things. The fact remains though that he is not admitting wrong doing or trying to correct his behavior. His behavior could be a defense mechanism (he has this sort of an addiction to sex/internet), he is somewhat narcissistic and your confrontation had put him on the defense, the initial dating stage where he tried to charm you is over and you saw other characteristics of his personality. He may also subconsciously be taking his frustration by acting this way onto you (something he may have as an unresolved issue with his ex).

Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience: Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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